CDC reccommends washing your hands for 20 seconds. You know what takes roughly 20 seconds to say?

“Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no one has gone before.”

You’re not required to hum the theme afterwards, but who’s gonna stop you, honestly.

Monica Marier on Facebook

Earlier today, I made this joke on Twitter:

Hand sanitizer is sold out everywhere. So is isopropyl alcohol and aloe vera gel.

Anybody know the correct ratio for vodka and personal lubricant?

And while that didn’t come even close to going viral (two replies and three hearts), so I know I’m not to blame, I was amused to see this article this afternoon:

As hand sanitizer disappears from the shelves across the U.S. while the coronavirus spreads, the social media team for Tito’s Vodka has been spending much of its time explaining to fans that hand sanitizer made with their product would not be effective for preventing COVID-19.

“As soon as we saw the incorrect articles and social posts, we wanted to set the record straight,” a Tito’s spokesperson told The Dallas Morning News. “While it would be good for business for our fans to use massive quantities of Tito’s for hand sanitizer, it would be a shame to waste the good stuff, especially if it doesn’t sanitize (which it doesn’t, per the CDC).”

Liberally adapted from this Washington Post article, a list of best practices for dealing with the coronavirus:

  • Don’t Panic!
  • The basics: Wash your hands regularly. Cover your nose and mouth when you sneeze. And when you’re sick, stay home from work or school and drink lots of fluids.
  • Keep the shopping cart light: Surgical masks? If you’re not sick, you don’t need to wear them. The main point of the mask is to keep someone who is infected with the virus from spreading it to others. If you’re itching to buy something, you can stick to the typical respiratory-virus medicine: decongestants, anti-inflammatory drugs and acetaminophen for fevers.
  • Practice makes permanent: One of the best things you can do to prepare for any emergency, including a coronavirus outbreak, is put together an emergency kit. It’s also important to have plans in place in case the outbreak disrupts your daily routines.
  • Be mindful of where you are: Health officials have stressed keeping your distance from people who are sick, especially when it comes to respiratory viruses. It is worth considering limiting exposure to large groups, especially during flu season. In confined spaces, such as mass transit, it’s important to look around and see what’s going on, see where everyone’s hands are going and make a mental note to wash up later. But awareness cuts both ways—just because someone has the sniffles or has a cough, it doesn’t mean they have the coronavirus.
  • Watch what you read: Hoaxes, lies and junk science about coronavirus have swirled online since the earliest cases were reported, mostly through social media. Look to trustworthy sources, such as the CDC, the World Health Organization and local health departments, to stay informed.
  • Be kind: As coronavirus has spread, so, too, has anti-Asian prejudice. The WHO has urged government agencies to do what they can to prevent discrimination against specific populations, since stigmatization can fuel the spread of the outbreak by driving marginalized individuals to hide infection and avoid seeking treatment. Remember to not let fear override your common humanity about how you treat other people.