{"id":1976,"date":"2003-11-26T03:01:59","date_gmt":"2003-11-26T19:01:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/11\/26\/just-what-i-always-wanted\/"},"modified":"2019-12-06T10:52:29","modified_gmt":"2019-12-06T18:52:29","slug":"just-what-i-always-wanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/11\/26\/just-what-i-always-wanted\/","title":{"rendered":"Just what I always wanted!"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:12762,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/BookPage.asp?prod_cd=c6230&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12763,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6212&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12764,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6234&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20041210043215\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com:80\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6234&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:33&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:33&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12765,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6232&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20050401163227\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com:80\\\/BookPage.asp?prod_cd=c6232&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:36&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:36&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12766,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6231&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20050212062741\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com:80\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6231&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:37&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:15:37&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:403},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12767,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com\\\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6213&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20050415111826\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.thbookservice.com:80\\\/BookPage.asp?prod_cd=c6213&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:27:10&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:503}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 02:27:10&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:503},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>This is so, so, so, <em>so <strong>not<\/strong><\/em> on my Christmas Wish List:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/graphics\/2003\/11\/graphics\/anncoulter.jpg\" title=\"Talking Ann Coulter Action Figure\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Talking Ann Coulter Action Figure\" src=\"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/graphics\/2003\/11\/graphics\/anncoulter-thumb.jpg\" width=\"60\" height=\"150\" align=\"right\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n  Amuse your conservative friends and annoy your liberal neighbors with the brand new <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/BookPage.asp?prod_cd=c6230\" title=\"Ann Coulter Talking Action Figure\">Ann Coulter Talking Action Figure<\/a>. This incredibly lifelike action figure looks just like the beautiful Ann Coulter, and best of all . . . it sounds like Ann, too!<\/p>\n<p>  &#91;&#8230;&#93;<\/p>\n<p>  This highly collectible doll comes in a display box with information highlighting Ann&#8217;s unique contributions to America&#8217;s political discourse. If you can&#8217;t get enough Ann Coulter, you&#8217;ll want to order the Ann Coulter Talking Action Figure today!\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>At first I thought this was a joke or a prank or something, especially given the quotes that are apparently programmed into the doll (&#8220;Liberals hate America, they hate flag-wavers, they hate abortion opponents, they hate all religions except Islam, post 9\/11. Even Islamic terrorists don&#8217;t hate America like Liberals do. They don&#8217;t have the energy. If they had that much energy, they&#8217;d have indoor plumbing by now.&#8221;), but as far as I can tell, this is completely serious.<\/p>\n<p>There is an entire series of &#8220;Talking Presidents&#8221; action figures available on this website that all have included quotes that seem to be meant to honor the person in question, including <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6212\" title=\"George W. Bush Talking Action Figure\">George W. Bush<\/a> (&#8220;Freedom itself was attacked by faceless cowards, and freedom will be defended.&#8221;), <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6234\" title=\"George H. W. Bush Talking Action Figure\">George H. W. Bush<\/a> (&#8220;I don&#8217;t see how you can be President if you didn&#8217;t believe in a being greater than yourself. I don&#8217;t see how you get the strength that you need at quiet moments, the tough moments.&#8221;), and <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6232\" title=\"Dennis Miller Talking Action Figure\">Dennis Miller<\/a> (&#8220;The only way we were going to get the French to go into Iraq was to tell them we thought there were truffles in there.&#8221;). There&#8217;s even one for <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6231\" title=\"Donald H. Rumsfeld Talking Action Figure\">Donald Rumsfeld<\/a> (&#8220;The only choice one has is to proceed and use coercion.&#8221;), which I find at least as disturbing as the Ann Coulter action figure. The most obvious exception is the action figure for <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thbookservice.com\/bookpage.asp?prod_cd=c6213\" title=\"Bill Clinton Talking Action Figure\">Bill Clinton<\/a> (&#8220;I experimented with marijuana a time or two and didn&#8217;t like it, and didn&#8217;t inhale and never tried it again.&#8221;).<\/p>\n<p>Truly bizarre. I guess you want to keep everyone happy over the Christmas season, right?<\/p>\n<p>(via the usual suspects)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Amuse your conservative friends and annoy your liberal neighbors with the brand new Ann Coulter Talking Action Figure.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2042],"tags":[14],"class_list":["post-1976","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-politics","tag-politics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1976","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1976"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1976\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1976"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1976"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1976"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}