{"id":2042,"date":"2003-12-18T14:58:53","date_gmt":"2003-12-19T06:58:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/12\/18\/about-airplanes\/"},"modified":"2019-12-06T14:53:42","modified_gmt":"2019-12-06T22:53:42","slug":"about-airplanes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/12\/18\/about-airplanes\/","title":{"rendered":"About airplanes"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:5168,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.hanscomfamily.com&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/www.hanscomfamily.com\\\/&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>After his many years of flying with the USAF and AANG, I&#8217;d bet that <a href=\"http:\/\/www.hanscomfamily.com\/\" title=\"The Hanscom Family Weblog\">Dad<\/a> has heard many of these before, or can at least vouch for their truism&#8230;<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n  Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death&#8230;I Shall Fear No Evil&#8230;For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; sign over the entrance to the SR-71 operating location Kadena, Japan<\/p>\n<p>  You&#8217;ve never been lost until you&#8217;ve been lost at Mach 3.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Paul F. Crickmore, test pilot<\/p>\n<p>  There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Blue Water Navy truism<\/p>\n<p>  When a prang (crash) seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slowly and gently as possible.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII<\/p>\n<p>  The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Attributed to Max Stanley, Northrop test pilot<\/p>\n<p>  A pilot who doesn&#8217;t have any fear probably isn&#8217;t flying his plane to its maximum.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Jon McBride, astronaut<\/p>\n<p>  If you&#8217;re faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the crash as possible.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Bob Hoover, renowned aerobatic and test pilot<\/p>\n<p>  If an airplane is still in one piece, don&#8217;t cheat on it; ride the bastard down.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Ernest K. Gann, author &amp; aviator<\/p>\n<p>  There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970<\/p>\n<p>  Now I know what a dog feels like watching TV.<\/p>\n<p>  &#8212; A DC-9 captain trainee attempting to check out on the &#8216;glass cockpit&#8217; of an A-320<\/p>\n<p>  If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it&#8217;s probably a helicopter &#8212; and therefore, unsafe.<\/p>\n<p>  Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.<\/p>\n<p>  What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, the pilot dies.<\/p>\n<p>  The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: &#8220;Why is it doing that?&#8221;, &#8220;Where are we?&#8221; and &#8220;Oh SHIT!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>  Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.<\/p>\n<p>  Progress in airline flying; now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.<\/p>\n<p>  Airspeed, altitude, brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.<\/p>\n<p>  A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck; three in a row is prevarication.<\/p>\n<p>  I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.<\/p>\n<p>  Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!<\/p>\n<p>  Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.<\/p>\n<p>  Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.<\/p>\n<p>  When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten.<\/p>\n<p>  Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.<\/p>\n<p>  Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.<\/p>\n<p>  The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time.<\/p>\n<p>  If something hasn&#8217;t broken on your helicopter, it&#8217;s about to.<\/p>\n<p>  You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>(via the usual suspects)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2043],"tags":[16],"class_list":["post-2042","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-quotes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2042","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2042"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2042\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2042"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2042"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2042"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}