{"id":2054,"date":"2003-12-22T15:13:05","date_gmt":"2003-12-23T07:13:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/12\/22\/got-it-got-it-need-it-got-it-not-a-chance-need-it-got-it\/"},"modified":"2019-12-06T14:58:34","modified_gmt":"2019-12-06T22:58:34","slug":"got-it-got-it-need-it-got-it-not-a-chance-need-it-got-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/12\/22\/got-it-got-it-need-it-got-it-not-a-chance-need-it-got-it\/","title":{"rendered":"Got it, got it, need it, got it, not a chance, need it, got it&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:12596,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.geekmuffin.com\\\/archives\\\/000513.html&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20050106201454\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.geekmuffin.com:80\\\/archives\\\/000513.html&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 00:31:58&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:436}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-12 00:31:58&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:436},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12597,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.theferrett.com\\\/purity&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/theferrett.com\\\/purity&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:12597,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.theferrett.com\\\/purity&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/theferrett.com\\\/purity&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>While I&#8217;m still partial to the <a href=\"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2003\/06\/the_purity_test.html\" title=\"The Purity Test\">&#8220;Old School&#8221; purity tests<\/a>, Kirsten <a href=\"http:\/\/www.geekmuffin.com\/archives\/000513.html\" title=\"geek*muffin: Dirty little...\">pointed out<\/a> a page that bills itself as <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theferrett.com\/purity\/\" title=\"The Ultimate Purity Test\">the &#8216;ultimate&#8217; purity test<\/a>, and I <em>had<\/em> to give it a shot&#8230;<\/p>\n<table width=\"350\">\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"3\"><strong>Your <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theferrett.com\/purity\">Ultimate Purity Score<\/a> Is&#8230; <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\"><strong>Category<\/strong><\/td>\n<td><strong>Your Score<\/strong><\/td>\n<td><strong>Average<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Self-Lovin&#8217;<\/td>\n<td><b>21.7%<\/b><br \/>I wouldn&#8217;t shake hands, if I were you<\/td>\n<td>65%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Shamelessness<\/td>\n<td><b>57.1%<\/b><br \/>It takes a couple of drinks<\/td>\n<td>79.4%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Sex Drive<\/td>\n<td><b>15.8%<\/b><br \/>Humps fire hydrants when nobody&#8217;s looking<\/td>\n<td>77.7%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Straightness<\/td>\n<td><b>1.8%<\/b><br \/>Knows the other body type like a map<\/td>\n<td>44.9%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Gayness<\/td>\n<td><b>58.9%<\/b><br \/>Had that experience at camp<\/td>\n<td>83.4%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"125\">Fucking Sick<\/td>\n<td><b>70.8%<\/b><br \/>Dipped into depravity<\/td>\n<td>89.9%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"3\">You are 40.15% pure<br \/>Average Score: 72.6%<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"3\">\n<div align=\"center\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.theferrett.com\/purity\"><strong>Take The Ultimate Purity Test<br \/>and see how you match up!<\/strong><\/a><\/div>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<p>Just to clarify, the numbers refer to how pure I am in any particular category &#8212; in other words, I&#8217;m only 1.8% pure in the &#8220;Straightness&#8221; category, so I&#8217;m 98.2% <em>im<\/em>pure (not much I haven&#8217;t done) for that category. As for the rest&#8230;no, I won&#8217;t elaborate in public. So sorry. ;)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>While I&#8217;m still partial to the &#8216;Old School&#8217; purity tests, Kirsten pointed out a page that bills itself as the &#8216;ultimate&#8217; purity test, and I had to give it a shot&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2043],"tags":[39],"class_list":["post-2054","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-links"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2054","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2054"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2054\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2054"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2054"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2054"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}