{"id":2219,"date":"2004-02-08T13:59:56","date_gmt":"2004-02-09T05:59:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2004\/02\/08\/this-is-so-juvenile-im-very-sorry\/"},"modified":"2019-12-09T16:06:05","modified_gmt":"2019-12-10T00:06:05","slug":"this-is-so-juvenile-im-very-sorry","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2004\/02\/08\/this-is-so-juvenile-im-very-sorry\/","title":{"rendered":"This is so juvenile. I&#8217;m very sorry."},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:11799,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.amazon.com\\\/exec\\\/obidos\\\/ASIN\\\/B000001Y6C\\\/djwudicom-20&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/www.amazon.com\\\/exec\\\/obidos\\\/ASIN\\\/B000001Y6C\\\/djwudicom-20&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>My computer doesn&#8217;t like my <a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000001Y6C\/djwudicom-20\" title=\"Prick\">Prick<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>I wanted to get my Prick into my computer. It didn&#8217;t seem like such a difficult task, should be simple enough, right? So I took out my Prick and put it into the computer.<\/p>\n<p>The computer pulled it in, sat for a moment, then pushed my Prick right back out again.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s odd, I thought. It&#8217;s certainly not what I was expecting.<\/p>\n<p>So I tried again. In went my Prick &#8212; and out came my Prick.<\/p>\n<p>Weird. I thought that maybe my Prick was dirty, so I took it, got a soft washcloth, and gently cleaned my Prick, taking care to stroke in straight lines and not use circular motions. Once that was done and my Prick looked nice and clean, I put it back into the computer.<\/p>\n<p>And the computer pushed my Prick right back out.<\/p>\n<p>Admittedly, I&#8217;ve had my Prick for a while now, and it is getting a bit old. Maybe that&#8217;s the problem.<\/p>\n<p>I guess I&#8217;ll just have to go to a store and get a new <a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000001Y6C\/djwudicom-20\" title=\"Prick\">Prick<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My computer doesn&#8217;t like my Prick.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2035],"tags":[6,80,2466],"class_list":["post-2219","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-music","tag-humor","tag-music","tag-prick"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2219","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2219"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2219\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2219"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2219"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2219"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}