{"id":2782,"date":"2004-09-01T18:21:42","date_gmt":"2004-09-02T08:21:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2004\/09\/02\/kids-ideas-about-sex\/"},"modified":"2019-12-11T08:24:52","modified_gmt":"2019-12-11T16:24:52","slug":"kids-ideas-about-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/2004\/09\/01\/kids-ideas-about-sex\/","title":{"rendered":"Kids&#8217; ideas about sex"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class='__iawmlf-post-loop-links' style='display:none;' data-iawmlf-post-links='[{&quot;id&quot;:10322,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.theonionavclub.com\\\/savagelove\\\/index.php?issue=4034&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:null,&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:10323,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.theonionavclub.com\\\/savagelove\\\/index.php?issue=4035&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20240529014101\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.theonionavclub.com\\\/savagelove\\\/index.php?issue=4035&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-11 02:58:54&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:429},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-19 14:43:34&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:429}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-19 14:43:34&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:429},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;},{&quot;id&quot;:10324,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;http:\\\/\\\/www.metafilter.com\\\/mefi\\\/35318&quot;,&quot;archived_href&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/web-wp.archive.org\\\/web\\\/20080726141007\\\/http:\\\/\\\/www.metafilter.com\\\/mefi\\\/35318&quot;,&quot;redirect_href&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;checks&quot;:[{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-11 02:59:02&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-19 14:43:32&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200}],&quot;broken&quot;:false,&quot;last_checked&quot;:{&quot;date&quot;:&quot;2026-03-19 14:43:32&quot;,&quot;http_code&quot;:200},&quot;process&quot;:&quot;done&quot;}]'><\/div>\n<p>Sex columnist Dan Savage recently asked his readers to submit letters detailing their childhood misconceptions about sex. The resulting two columns are hilarious&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonionavclub.com\/savagelove\/index.php?issue=4034\" title=\"August 25, 2004\">Part one &#8212; the boys<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n  I was about 10 or 11 when we visited my Aunt Edie. I&#8217;d already had &#8220;the talk,&#8221; and I had a fairly good idea of what &#8220;adult&#8221; meant. Adult movies. Adult videos. Adult magazines. I was told that my Aunt Edie now lived in an &#8220;adult community.&#8221; Now, my aunt was a good 80 years old by this point, and I&#8217;d met her wrinkly ass at a few family gatherings, so when we got to the (clearly labeled) adult community, I got really creeped out. I asked my parents if they were really supposed to bring a kid in here, and upon more questioning explained my reasoning. After laughing so hard my dad had to stop the car, they cleared everything up.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonionavclub.com\/savagelove\/index.php?issue=4035\" title=\"September 1, 2004\">Part two &#8212; the girls<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\n  I went with my dad to visit his best friend, who bred Saint Bernards. While there, I saw this large wooden contraption and asked Dad what it was for. Turns out it was a breeding support, so the dog (who is usually well over 150 pounds) doesn&#8217;t hurt the bitch. My dad explained what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies. He explained as accurately as a 4-year-old could understand, and I seemed to get what he was talking about. Later that day, we came home and I ran up to my mother. &#8220;Mom! Guess what I learned today!&#8221; I then proceeded to give a fairly detailed description of what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies, followed by the exclamation, &#8220;You and Dad should do that!&#8221; You see, I wanted a puppy.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>(via <a href=\"http:\/\/www.metafilter.com\/mefi\/35318\" title=\"Classic Underage Misconceptions\">MeFi<\/a>)<\/p>\n<p><strong>iTunes:<\/strong> &#8220;Dreams&#8221; by Cranberries, The from the album <em>Alterno-Daze: 90&#8217;s Natural Selection<\/em> (1995, 4:33).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sex columnist Dan Savage recently asked his readers to submit letters detailing their childhood misconceptions about sex. The resulting two columns are hilarious&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2028],"tags":[39],"class_list":["post-2782","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-links","tag-links"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2782","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2782"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2782\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2782"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2782"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/michaelhans.com\/eclecticism\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2782"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}