Yeah, well I hate your politics, too! Beautifully written, very funny, and very true.
Liberals: …Liberals are politically able to have all sorts of freaky mammal sex but typically don’t; good liberal foreplay is a permission slip and three layers of impermeable barriers. The only vaguely liberal person we know of who seemed to enjoy sex in the last 30 years is Clinton, and look what he got out of it….
Conservatives: …Conservatives don’t actually bother to spend time with people who are not conservative, and thus become confused and irritable when people disagree with them; fundamentally can’t see how that’s even possible, which shows an almost charming intellectual naivete….
Libertarians: …Never got over the fact they weren’t the illegitimate children of Robert Heinlein and Ayn Rand; currently punishing the rest of us for it…. Blissfully clueless that Libertarianism is just great as long as it doesn’t actually involve real live humans….