Talk about geek heaven!

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This entry was published at least two years ago (originally posted on December 25, 2003). Since that time the information may have become outdated or my beliefs may have changed (in general, assume a more open and liberal current viewpoint). A fuller disclaimer is available.

The 'Glow Grave'

I just stumbled across this while perusing the Ship of Fools’ 12 Days of Kitchmas (which is well-worth visiting in itself), and just cannot get over this item: the ‘Glow Grave’ — a stainless-steel grave marker complete with an LCD display that can be hooked into a PC interface to change the epitaph whenever you want!

I can’t. Stop. Laughing.

All I want to do is put a motion detector or pressure sensor on one of these things and hook it into a computer attached to the display so that it can dynamically react to people coming by to visit the grave site. Once it detects someone standing at the grave site, the screen would suddenly start displaying messages from the dear departed…

“I see you!”
“Hey, buster, you’re on my head.”
“It’s hot down here!”
“I knew it — God uses a Mac.”
“Help! There’s no air!”
“These worms really itch.”
“God is a woman after all!”
“You’re next.”

6 thoughts on “Talk about geek heaven!”

  1. Here are some more epitaphs from the dearly departed…

    “I told them velvet lining in the coffin!”
    “Hey St. Peter, is Elvis really … you know? He Is! Which One?”
    “You know, that bright light really was a train.”
    Man: “I’ve always hated this suit!”
    Woman: “This dress does make me look fat!”
    “They could have at least put a DVD player in this coffin!”
    “Is it just me or does it smell in here?”
    “Eat at Jesus’s!”
    “Live Nude Girls! Live, get it! I kill me! Seriously, I did.”
    “OK, this ain’t funny anymore …. LET ME OUT!”
    “Damn, even Heaven has a Starbucks! Hey, there’s another one.”
    “So that’s what happened to Hitler.”
    “I see dead people!”

  3. Apple has announced today the new i-Coffin.
    A sleek modern interpatation of the standard beige box.
    3 models available (G-99 shown)

    The G-99 has set the standard for the coffin world.
    Quad 62.5 processors
    500 Terabyte HD
    64GB DDR SDRAM
    48 PCI and PCI-X slots
    200x super drive CD/RW and DVD/RW
    50 USB and USB+
    99 Fire wire 400
    99 Firewire 800
    AirPort Extreme
    Fiber optic and Digital interface.
    And comes standard with OS-XXXXV

    Rest in the peace that only comes from you knowing that even in death you still have the best computer available today.

    The G-99 is an innovative aluminum enclosure with superquiet operation. Guaranteed to provide you with years and years of blissful gaming or web surfing.

    Low interest financing on OAC.
    Military and student discount available.

    See dealer for pricing.

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