You’re never too old to die for your country

This entry was published at least two years ago (originally posted on October 22, 2004). Since that time the information may have become outdated or my beliefs may have changed (in general, assume a more open and liberal current viewpoint). A fuller disclaimer is available.

Though, I certainly hope this gentleman doesn’t end up dying for his country — he’s a 70-year old retired doctor who’s been called into service.

Dr. John J. Caulfield was incredulous about the Army’s “unsolicited communication” inviting his return to active duty toward easing increasing wartime demands on military medical treatment facilities.

He disregarded the first postcard last December and the second and subsequent phone messages on the answering machine, not from any unwillingness to serve — “My government has never asked me to do anything I ever refused” — but figuring they used the wrong mailing list, it’s not really me they want.

The Army persisted. Would Dr. Caulfield, oral surgeon and Vietnam veteran, retired from military service in 1980 and civilian practice Jan. 1, be willing to return to active duty in, say, Iraq or Afghanistan? The negotiations began with Dr. Caulfield asking, “Do you know how old I am?” They did, and age doesn’t matter, “We want you.”

Dr. Caulfield, who turned 70 Aug. 7, reports to Fort Benning, Ga., Oct. 17 for what he and the military describe as “voluntary deployment” with the 325th Combat Support Hospital in Bagram, Afghanistan.

At least it’s good to know that Bush has assured us that our military isn’t overstretched and that there won’t be a draft. After all, why in the world would we need a draft when we can just re-enlist 70-year old retirees?

(via Terrance)

[Update:]{.underline}

It’s all a hoax.

So there was Wallace on television Thursday night, telling KNTV (Ch. 11) how excited he was at the prospect of serving his country. A friend of his had called the television station.

The only problem is that the whole thing was a joke — a big one that got out of hand.

It went a little bit farther than I'd planned,'' said Wallace's son-in-law, Mark Flaa of San Jose.It was supposed to have been a family thing, one of those things you get ribbed about for the next 10 Christmases or something.”

Flaa had gone to great lengths to make the joke work — getting copies of a friend’s orders to serve in Iraq and mailing what he wrote to his brother in Seattle, so the letter could be mailed from Fort Lewis in Washington.

And he knew his father-in-law would call him, which he did. What he didn’t count on was Wallace going on TV. Flaa didn’t find out until a few minutes before Wallace’s interview with KNTV aired on the 11 o’clock news Thursday night.

Thanks to Mike for the update!

iTunesYou’ll Be Under My Wheels ” by Prodigy, The from the album Always Outnumbered, Never Outgunned (2004, 3:56).