Don’t ignore the real world

by
This entry was published at least two years ago (originally posted on March 13, 2004). Since that time the information may have become outdated or my beliefs may have changed (in general, assume a more open and liberal current viewpoint). A fuller disclaimer is available.

Computers are wonderful things. A computer plus the Internet is even more so, with the ability to connect easily, quickly, and in many different ways with people around the world.

But the real world is a very important thing, too — and it scares me when people will abandon their lives for the sake of online interactions. The Everquest Daily Grind tracks stories from people whose lives have been affected by Everquest addicts…

My 15 yr old son bought the game two years ago for his sister. My husband took it over and has been playing constantly ever since. My son says he regrets ever buying it and considers anyone who plays computer games all day to be a loser. It’s hurt his relationship with his dad.

…He starts playing about ten mins after getting home from work and stops just long enough to eat dinner. Then he plays again til bedtime around 11. ON weekends he gets up around 8am and plays all day til 10 or 11pm.

…I don’t know if he realizes how bad things are between him and all of us. The kids have lost respect for him and I am very lonely. We just live our lives without him.

I’ve seen this happen with friends, too.

I’ve watched one friend lose his friends, girlfriend, job, and health because he did nothing except play EQ, sunup to sundown. I’ve consoled the girlfriend of another when he ignored her attempts to coax him into bed, preferring to play his game.

Of course, it’s not just EQ, but virtually all forms of online interaction that can prompt his sort of behavior in people. IRC channels, web-based chat, online gaming, discussion boards…even weblogs (gasp!) can interfere with people’s real lives — and not just the people that are directly involved — if they’re allowed to have too much influence.

I’ve always kept a fairly strict hierarchy for my interactions, and it’s rare that I’ll deviate without good reason. In order from most to least important, with each able to be superseded at any time by the item above:

  1. Real-world, face-to-face interactions.
  2. Phone calls.
  3. IM messages.
  4. Online chat.
  5. Online games (mostly included just to fill out the list, as I’ve never been much of a gamer, let alone an online gamer).

Personally, I find it somewhat amazing that people can approach the world with a different set of priorities, but it’s obvious (and somewhat sad) that they do.

(via Boing Boing)

iTunes: “Pore” by ohGr from the album Welt (2001, 3:57).