Personal

Okay…this is hilarious. I went to SparkMatch and took their test, and — well, after all’s said and done, I’m a Furry Dildo, also known as a Dependent Evil Sex Provider. Hmm. Here’s what they say about me:

The ultimate sexual contradiction. You’re quite dirty, and very into carnal excavation, but you also have a soft romantic side. And, honestly, THAT side is itself conflicted — you’re needy and giving at the same time. It’s like you need to need to give to need. What’s that all about?

I admire the unscalable heights of your lust; I myself wish I had a height that size, but all the same, you don’t seem to be using that lust wisely. A more moral and independent person would be having mind-blowing sex with the woman I love right now. Instead, your physical potential is hindered by two things: an innate desire to do what you’re not supposed to, and this strange clinginess that you seem to mistake as heartfelt romance. Come off it.

I like that you seem to have a sensitive side, but be sincere about it. For instance, don’t tell some girl you like ponies, if really you don’t like ponies. Admit who you are, a horny guy, and the good qualities you have — devotion, compassion, and nutrition — will have real value.

So, that’s what SparkMatch has to say about my romantic tendencies. Interesting — very interesting….

Well, I went and got a wild hair up my butt and decided to head up to Fairbanks for a weekend to goof off, visit my brother, and meet up with some friends. Should be fun…so, in about a month (the weekend of May 18th – 20th), I’ll be heading north for some playtime…woohoo!

My parents had their van stolen Wednesday night. If anyone who sees this could keep their eyes open, and, if you’re lucky enough to see it, give a call to the police, it would be greatly appreciated.

At the time of the theft, the van was a teal (bluish green) 2000 Mazda MPV LX with the licence HAK 342. It could be anywhere — abandoned on a street or road, in a used car lot, in a parking lot, etc. Licence plates can be switched, of course. Important — if anyone sees it, they should not do anything but call the police.

Thanks for any help you can be — because of the backlog of cases, APD may not be able to get to this for 1-2 weeks.

This actually came about from an e-mail I was writing tonight, and I thought it was a bit too good to lose into the great bit bucket in the sky.

The meaning behind it…well, it’s kind of my life view. I’ve always liked the concept of the yin-yang — that in life there is always light and dark, good and bad, and they’re intertwined and essential to each other, you can’t have one without the other, and if you did, then it would render it meaningless without the other as a comparison.

But when I found the design with the smileys integrated into it, it really struck a chord with me, in that much of my outlook on life is that no matter what happens to me, good or bad, there will always be something to balance it, and when things do get bad, one, they’ll get better at some point, and two, there is always something to laugh at or smile about in whatever’s going on in order to help me make it through it. I’ve seen lots of people get amazingly depressed over some stuff that, while it may seem mindblowing at first, always has some benefit to it. I guess it’s kind of related to two overused sayings — “For every cloud there is a silver lining”, and Nietzche’s (sp?) “What does not kill me makes me stronger”, but it’s not really either of those through and through…just something that means a lot to me.

Hmm…don’t really have a topic at the moment. I’m just sitting at work, waiting for the headset to beep in my ear, and killing time until the end of the day. Of course, the end of the day today isn’t going to be for quite a while — while I normally get off work at 4pm, I’ve got training today that’ll keep me here until 8pm. Not entirely bad, training helps and I get paid overtime for it…just means I’ve got a while before I make it home.

Of course, I’m not sure why I should be in some sort of rush to get home. One roommate works out on a rig for one of the oil companies with a 2-on/1-off rotation that he’s in the middle of right now, so he won’t be home; the other roommate works evening hours that often stretch into the late night, so I hardly see him either. Lately I get more companionship from my two pet ferrets than I do from any of the people I live with or am friends with, it seems like. Not to make it sound like it’s their fault — I’ve got a pretty busy work schedule myself — it just gets a bit grating sometimes.

I’m looking forward more and more to getting out of here and getting down to Seattle lately. Seems like every time I turn around I’ve got more reasons to leave, and less to stay. This town just gets under my skin more and more often lately — it all seems much to small, and none of it seems to fit me anymore. I can’t say whether or not Seattle will be any better, but it’s a place to start, and if I decide that it’s not the place to be, then at least it’ll be a lot easier to get someplace else from there than it is from up here.

Okay, here’s something scary, which more than likely contributes to my slightly off-kilter frame of mind. In just about two weeks, I hit my 28^th birthday, and just a couple months after that, the Bartlett High School Class of ’91 has its 10-year anniversary here in town. I’m really not sure what I think of this…some days I think it would be entertaining to hit, others there’s nothing I want to do more than to stay as far away from it as possible. I wasn’t exactly overly involved in my high school years — more of a social cockroach than anything else — and, while I’ve gone through a lot of changes over the intervening years, it often makes me wonder if I really want to meet up with these people again. Some of these people I’d been going to school with since elementary school days, and yet for so much of the time it seemed to me that I didn’t exist for them — we’d be in the same classes, know the same people, but unless there was some really compelling reason to notice me, most of them very rarely did. Even today, after years of dj’ing and being something of a public figure and losing a lot of my shyness through that, I’m still a bit overly reticent when meeting people. If I’m not in the spotlight, as I am when dj’ing, then I’ll usually hang back, keep my mouth shut, and not draw attention to myself — a hangover from the days when it seemed like it was better for me not to intrude on the lives of these people that I was forced to spend seven hours out of every day with.

So is this something I really want to do — after 10 years, see these people again? I’m really not sure. Admittedly, I’m hardly the same person I was then, and, most likely, few of them are either, but it’s still a strong enough reminder of how little I liked myself, my surroundings, or my environment back then that it gives me a serious pause. Hmm…well, I guess I’ll find out as it gets closer.

In any case, this is probably more than enough of my self-indulgent, slightly morose babble. Back to the phones….