Quotes

A collection of quotes that I’ve found interesting at one point or another over the years.

Better Living Through Apathy

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As cynical as it may be, I think there just might be something to Davan’s theory in today’s Something Positive strip.

Peejee: You don’t really care about this date, do you?

Davan: Not even an ounce. If I did, I probably wouldn’t be going on it.

Peejee: Care to explain?

Davan: When you’re involved with someone else, people find you attractive. It’s because you don’t care about attracting someone else. You’re complacent, and therefore you’re actually being yourself.

After Branwen, I’ve just not been interested in trying to find anyone else. As long as I maintain that same level of ‘it honestly doesn’t matter to me if you live or die,’ women will find me attractive on some level. The minute I show any interest, it’s over. Remember that. The key to happiness is disinterest mingled with mild contempt.

iTunes “You Are My Sunshine” by Cash, Johnny/Dylan, Bob from the album CBS Nashville Studio Session (1969, 3:27).

Heteroflexible

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One of the mailing lists I belong to (though I don’t chime in terribly often) is that of the Utilikilts Yahoo! Group. For the past few days there’s been an interesting discussion of sexuality. Over the course of the discussion, I just stumbled across a new term that I’d not heard before, but that I like a lot.

My own experience has been a interesting adventure. I had always been devout hetero. I like men. I like the way they feel, the way they smell (most of the time). I like the masculineness (if that’s a word) of a man. I like to feel feminine in his big hands and strong arms. I like sex with a man. That being said, I discovered in the last couple of years that an occational romp with another woman is just plain fun. My husband says “For instant lesbian, just add taquilla”… that’s me, but does that make me gay or just a horny drunk?

yes. although the term i’ve heard bandied about is heteroflexible.

Heteroflexible. What a wonderful word — especially for someone who’s comfortable self-identifying as 85-90% straight. Apparently this isn’t a new word, either, though it’s the first time I’d run across it.

Here’s Word Spy’s definition:

heteroflexible (het.ur.oh.FLEKS.uh.bul) n. A heterosexual person who is open to relationships with people of the same sex. —adj. Also: hetero-flexible, heteroflex.
-—heteroflexibility n.

iTunes “Transitions” by Beastie Boys, The from the album Ill Communication (1994, 2:31).

Social Realist

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Some silly/fun astrology bits from #flickr tonight…

djwudi: what’re you doing, underbunny?
underbunny: …I’m reading from my favorite astrobooks, dj.
djwudi: aah, okies
platinum: UB, what was the title of that book again?
underbunny: …the Secret Language of Birthdays, & then there’s the Secret Language of Relationships.
underbunny: …gimme your birthday, dj!
djwudi: May 3
djwudi: ’bout two weeks ’til I hit 32
djwudi: whee!
platinum: Lord, May is that close? Wow!
underbunny: …May 3, the Day of the Social Realist.
underbunny: …strengths are insightful, clever & charming.
underbunny: …weaknesses are demanding, procrastinating & head-headed.
underbunny: …oops!
underbunny: …hard-headed. :)
djwudi: I am not stubborn!
djwudi: dammit
djwudi stomps his foot
underbunny: …hehe.
underbunny: …got someone to match with?
djwudi laughs
djwudi: Nov. 3
djwudi: my g/f
underbunny: …dj, you’re not going to like it.
djwudi laughs
underbunny: …May 3 & November 3.
djwudi: that’s encouraging
djwudi: gimme the bad news…
underbunny: …k.
underbunny: …it’s got a pretty title? :)
underbunny: …Crusading Spirit.
underbunny: …o wait!
underbunny: …read the wrong one!
underbunny: …which you’re not going to like either. :D
djwudi laughs!
djwudi: doomed!
djwudi: doomed, I tell you!
underbunny: …also pretty title.
djwudi: star cross’d lovers, and all that
underbunny: …Second Childhood.
underbunny: …strengths are entertaining, youthful & relaxed.
underbunny: …weaknesses are closed off, misdirected & stubborn.
underbunny: …best for friendship.
underbunny: …worst for love.
djwudi: hmmmmmmm…
djwudi: well, we seem to be doing well so far
djwudi: I’ll just keep my fingers crossed :D

Admittedly, I don’t put much stock in astrology or such things, but I’ll freely admit that they’re fun to play with. I think Prairie and I are doing better than this book seems to expect, though…

iTunes “Home (Air ‘Around the Golf’ Remix)” by Depeche Mode from the album Remixes 81-04 (Limited Edition) (2004, 3:55).

Limerick for a Swan

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When I dropped into the #flickr channel today on lunch, the denizens were tossing around limericks for the various regulars. Cygnoir hadn’t been graced with one yet, so I managed to come up with the following:

Cygnoir’s on a poetry kick
but finding a rhyme for her nick
isn’t easy to do
so I hope when I’m through
she’ll laugh ‘staid of aiming a kick!

Not bad for coming right off the top of my head. :)

The War Prayer

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This is so good.

The War Prayer, by Mark Twain

O Lord God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with pale forms of their patriotic dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst…for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives…. We ask it in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the source of all Love.

(via Terrance)

iTunes “Masters of War” by Dylan, Bob from the album Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan, The (1963, 4:34).

On Valentine’s Day

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Valentine’s Day is like the opposite of Christmas. On Christmas we go to bed looking forward to exchanging gifts with the people we love. On Valentine’s Day we exchange gifts hoping to go to bed with the people we love.

— Zefrank

(via Swirlee)

Laurie Anderson: Mach 20

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SpermLadies and gentlemen, what you are observing here are magnified examples, or facsimiles, of human sperm. Generation after generation of these tiny creatures have sacrificed themselves in the persistent, often futile attempt to transport the basic male genetic code. But where’s this information coming from?

They have no eyes. No ears. Yet some of them already know that they will be bald. Some of them know that they will have small, crooked teeth. Over half of them will end up as women. Four hundred million living creatures, all knowing precisely the same thing. Carbon copies of each other, in a kamikaze race against the clock.

Now some of you may be surprised to learn that if a sperm were the size of a salmon, it would be swimming its seven inch journey at five hundred miles per hour.

If a sperm were the size of a whale, however, it would be traveling at fifteen thousand miles per hour, or mach 20.

Now imagine, if you will, four hundred million blind and desperate sperm whales departing from the Pacific coast of North America, swimming at fifteen thousand miles per hour, and arriving in Japanese coastal waters in just under forty-five minutes.

How would they be received?

Would they realize that they were carrying information? A message?

Would there be room for so many millions?

Would they know that they had been sent for a purpose?

— Laurie Andersen, ‘Mach 20’, off of United States Live

iTunes “Mach 20” by Anderson, Laurie from the album United States Live (1984, 2:47).