Quotes

A collection of quotes that I’ve found interesting at one point or another over the years.

Pshaw. Rank amateur.

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I think I mentioned to Bob [Geldof] I could make love for eight hours. What I didn’t say was that this included four hours of begging and then dinner and a movie.

— Sting, admitting to exaggerating his abilities in the past.

(via Go Fish)

Meetings are the mind killer

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I must not attend meetings. Meetings are the mind killer. Meetings are the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my meeting. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the wasted time has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

— 0xDECAFBAD, via Will Parker

(Incidentally, Will looks to be right up my alley — Dean supporter, TypePad user, and not only a Mac user, but part of the Microsoft Office for Mac development team. He’s getting added to my reading list!)

That hurts

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So…I noticed that you’ve been an American Express cardholder since I was two.

— Kristin, our 21-year old receptionist, to Fred, our boss

The spectre of Spinal Tap

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We opened and closed the show, starting after a film sequence featuring a businessman searching sand dunes for a half-buried laptop, and a gravelly-voiced man saying in a so-baritone-it-must-be-important, film-trailer way, “There was a search for an internet business…”

The rest of the sequence was always lost to me as I was concentrating on standing upright and not wetting myself with laughter: Gravel Man was our signal that the revolving circular stage we were on was about to turn us briskly to face the audience and, we suspected, hurl our much ridiculed, old before his time guitarist into the front row like a ball off a dodgy roulette wheel. The spectre of Spinal Tap never leaves a rock band.

— Jesus Jones frontman Mike Edwards describing playing corporate gigs, in the Guardian Unlimited

(via kottke)

Mouseketeers

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One of the A-Listers says he was a VeeJay on MTV. But this is pretty much the 21st Century equivalent of some one saying he or she was an original Mousekateer. It’s been so long since any living soul has seen either one that, well.. who are we to say?

— Pops

Sufficient Reason

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The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reasons for remaining ashore.

— Vincent Van Gogh (via Dad)

California Gubernatorial circus

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Y’know, at the moment, I’m not sure if I’m relieved or disappointed that I didn’t end up in California. I haven’t read enough of the details of their current political shake-up to know all the details, but just knowing that two of the higher-profile candidates are Arnold Schwarzenegger and Gary Coleman is enough to give me a fit of the giggles. What I wouldn’t give to see that debate session!

In the meantime, Wil pointed out this quote…

Arnold Schwarzenegger: Finally, a public official who can explain the administration’s social policies in the original German.

— Bill Maher

Update: Other candidates: Porn star Mary Carey (link NSFW, obviously), Hustler publisher Larry Flynt, and someone described as “aspiring platinum-haired billboard queen Angelyne” in this NBC report. This just gets better and better.

(update via Jonas)

This probably shouldn't be funny…

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The technology is not yet foolproof. The online edition of The New York Post, which is owned by the News Corporation, ran an article last month about a murder in which the victim’s body parts were packed in a suitcase, and Google served up an ad for a luggage dealer.

— from [If You Liked the Web Page, You’ll Love the Ad], in the New York Times

[If You Liked the Web Page, You’ll Love the Ad]: http://www.nytimes.com/2003/08/04/technology/04ECOM.html?ex=1375416000&en=2ac396ed576ca1b3&ei=5007&partner=USERLAND “If You Liked the Web Page,
You’ll Love the Ad”

Leadership

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A leader is best
when people barely know he exists;
…when his work is done, his aim fulfilled;
they will say,
“We did it ourselves.”

— Lao Tzu