New I, Robot trailer out

There’s a new trailer for the movie I, Robot, based on Isaac Asimov‘s writing. I’ve been looking forward to this for a while, but, as with all movie properties based on works that I’m a fan of, there was some definite trepidation.

On the one hand, not only were they adapting the stories of one of my favorite authors, but they also tapped one of my favorite directors, Alex Proyas (The Crow, Dark City). On the other hand…Will Smith stars. Nothing against Will Smith personally, as I generally enjoy the films I see him in, but I’ve never seen him do much serious work — his strengths seem to have been in comedic and action vehicles. Asimov, on the other hand, while often extremely funny, has more of a cerebral, often punnish sense of humor to his writing, and his works are generally far stronger on dialog and concepts than they are on action.

I, Robot screencapture

Now that I’ve seen the new trailer, I have to say, I’m more than a little worried. I was hoping for more strong, “thinking-person’s” science fiction along the lines of A.I., Contact, Gattaca, or Dark City (four of the best sci-fi films in recent years, in my opinion). Instead, what I got was…well, a Will Smith action-comedy, from the looks of it.

Admittedly, I’m basing this solely on a two-minute trailer, but I don’t think I’m entirely unjustified in being worried. Opening with shots of Smith’s Detective Spooner riding his motorcycle through the city streets of Chicago, we follow him into the offices of “the richest man in the world” as a murder investigation starts. The businessman offers Spooner coffee, then asks if there’s anything he can to do help.

“Sugar.”

“Sugar?”

“For the coffee.”

Oh…

“Oh, you thought I was calling you ‘Sugar’? Hey, you’re not that rich.”

From there, we move to quick shots of the investigation, as Spooner interviews the robot suspected of killing a human. Interspersed with the clips are Asimov’s famous Three Laws of Robotics — kind of.

Asimov himself often said that his Three Laws were probably the most famous lines he had ever written, out of his entire body of work, and have served as inspiration for many of today’s top robotics theorizers and designers as our technology progresses to the point where humanoid robotic creations are becoming more and more possible. The laws, as Asimov originally wrote them, are:

  1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
  2. A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
  3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

The laws as given to us in the I, Robot trailer, are now:

  1. They cannot hurt us.
  2. They must do what we say.
  3. They can protect themselves.

Okay, the essence is still there, and it’s entirely possible (and I’m hoping that) the original laws are quoted and expounded on in the film, and that these are merely the two-second screentime trailer versions. It was still enough to make me cringe.

I, Robot screencapture

From there, we move to quick action clips interspersed with dialog. In one, a robot jumps out of a window, flips over a couple times, and falls to the pavement, landing with a pavement-cracking jolt in a pose that could have been lifted straight from either of the trailers for the recent two Matrix movies or from the trailer for Underworld. Okay, it’s a cool shot and a good pose, but do we need to see it in every action movie trailer to hit the screen?

A few more clips later, we’re treated to an apparent robot mob in full attack mode, complete with smashing through doors, Aliens-style scuttling across walls and ceilings, robots backhanding and attacking people, and general mayhem, with all the robots suddenly sporting glowing red eyes and torsos (which gave them an amusingly ET-like look to me).

I will freely admit that the trailer looks good visually, and the effects look like they’ll be quite good. I just wish I wasn’t as worried about what had been done to the work of one of my favorite science-fiction authors.

I guess I’ll be able to form my final opinion July 16th, when the film opens. Until then, I’ll just be keeping my fingers crossed.

iTunes: “Darkness III” by In Absentia from the album Blood and Computers II (1994, 3:25).

Forecast: cloudy, 67% chance of God

Hey, all you atheists out there — looks like you’ve only got about a 33% chance of being right. According to Dr. Stephen Unwin, there is a 67% chance that God exists.

Dr Stephen Unwin has used a 200-year-old formula to calculate the probability of the existence of an omnipotent being. Bayes’ Theory is usually used to work out the likelihood of events, such as nuclear power failure, by balancing the various factors that could affect a situation.

The Manchester University graduate, who now works as a risk assessor in Ohio, said the theory starts from the assumption that God has a 50/50 chance of existing, and then factors in the evidence both for and against the notion of a higher being.

(via Neil Gaiman)

I should probably be worried about this…

Kirsten pointed out the Book Quiz — another of the many online personality tests, this one purporting to link your psyche to a novel.

My results?

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blockquote>Vladimir Nabokov's 'Lolita'

You’re Lolita!

by Vladimir Nabokov

Considered by most to be depraved and immoral, you are obsessed with sex. What really tantalizes you is that which deviates from societal standards in every way, though you admit that this probably isn’t the best and you’re not sure what causes this desire. Nonetheless, you’ve done some pretty nefarious things in your life, and probably gotten caught for them. The names have been changed, but the problems are real. Please stay away from children.

Take the Book Quiz at the Blue Pyramid.

Oh my.

[Ahem.]

Romeo! Hey, doll! Where you at?

This makes me cringe just thinking about it…Shakespeare re-written in modern prose, as today’s kids can’t seem to comprehend it as it was originally written.

“Et tu, Brute?”

Not anymore.

“And you too, Brutus?” is what students read in a new genre of study guides that modernize the Elizabethan English found in “Julius Caesar” and other plays by William Shakespeare.

These guides move beyond the plot summaries found in other study aides by providing line-by-line translations in modern-day English.

Once barred from school, the new translations now are being used in classes across metro Atlanta.

Ugh.

Ugh, ugh, ugh.

Or, more appropriately, in the words of Isabella in Measure for Measure — “Thy sin’s not accidental, but a trade.”

Or even better, Falstaff, in Henry the Fourth, Part II — “You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!”

Admittedly, I may be an odd case — after reading the abridged version of Les Misérables in high school, I fell so in love with the story that I went out and bought the full, unabridged version, and it’s remained one of my favorites ever since. So for me, hacking something up is bad enough…but re-writing it like this?

Truly a travesty.

The one possible good point I can see is if the kids are captivated enough by the stories that they may someday go out and find the original versions — but I don’t think I’ll be holding my breath on that count.

(via Ben Hammersley, with help from the Shakespearean Insult Generator)

iTunes: “I Hold a Prince” by Poems for Laila from the album La Fillette Triste (1991, 3:07).

Ilium

Oooohhh — a new book by Dan Simmons! Being a big fan of his Hyperion series (Hyperion, The Fall of Hyperion, Endymion, and The Rise of Endymion), this is very good news in my universe.

On Earth, a post-technological group of humans, pampered by servant machines and easy travel via “faxing,” begins to question its beginnings. Meanwhile, a team of sentient and Shakespeare-quoting robots from Jupiter’s lunar system embark on a mission to Mars to investigate an increase in dangerous quantum fluctuations. On the Red Planet, they’ll find a race of metahumans living out existence as the pantheon of classic Greek gods. These “gods” have recreated the Trojan War with reconstituted Greeks and Trojans and staffed it with scholars from throughout Earth’s history who observe the events and report on the accuracy of Homer’s Iliad. One of these scholars, Thomas Hockenberry, finds himself tangled in the midst of interplay between the gods and their playthings and sends the war reeling in a direction the blind poet could have never imagined.

Simmons creates an exciting and thrilling tale set in the thick of the Trojan War as seen through Hockenberry’s 20th-century eyes. At the same time, Simmons’s robots study Shakespeare and Proust and the origin-seeking Earthlings find themselves caught in a murderous retelling of The Tempest. Reading this highly literate novel does take more than a passing familiarity with at least The Iliad but readers who can dive into these heady waters and swim with the current will be amply rewarded.

(via John Ludwig)

iTunes: “Feurio! (Remix)” by Einstürzende Neubauten from the album Industrial Revolution, 2nd Edition (1989, 4:49).

Lord of the Rings dating tips

Epic fantasy as a dating manual?

  • When you’re trying to catch the cute guy’s eye is the exact moment the dwarf will pick to approach you;
  • Eating raw fish is no longer a sign of a sophisticated date. (That said, you have to admit the Atkins plan is working for Gollum.)
  • If you’re the only girl among 100 guys you’ll still fall for the only one who has a girlfriend;
  • When overused, terms of endearment such as “precious” lose their meaning;
  • All couples fight, but battles shouldn’t last so long that one of you has to get up and stretch your legs or use the bathroom;
  • It doesn’t matter if you look like Liv Tyler; your pining and whining will still get on people’s nerves;
  • Don’t blame your friends just because they can see right through your creepy little partner;
  • If you can get along on a road trip, the relationship will probably last;
  • There will come a point when it seems like the relationship should be over. Don’t drag it out. Just end it there.

And finally, the mother of all dating wisdom:

  • Some people will go to any lengths to get a ring; others, having had one for awhile, will go to any lengths to chuck it into a volcano.

(via Rachel)

iTunes: “Moron” by K.M.F.D.M. from the album WWIII (2003, 5:05).

Most-blogged books of 2003

Another list post, this time, All Consuming‘s list of the most-blogged books of 2003. As before, books in bold and prefaced with » I’ve read.

  1. » Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Book 5) by J. K. Rowling
  2. Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right by Al Franken
  3. The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
  4. » Quicksilver (The Baroque Cycle, Vol. 1) by Neal Stephenson
  5. Pattern Recognition by William Gibson
  6. Designing With Web Standards by Jeffrey Zeldman
  7. Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal by Eric Schlosser
  8. Smart Mobs: The Next Social Revolution by Howard Rheingold
  9. Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom by Cory Doctorow
  10. Life of Pi by Yann Martel
  11. Stupid White Men …and Other Sorry Excuses for the State of the Nation! by Michael Moore
  12. Dude, Where’s My Country? by Michael Moore
  13. » Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson
  14. » Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson
  15. » 1984 by George Orwell
  16. Treason : Liberal Treachery from the Cold War to the War on Terrorism by Ann Coulter
  17. Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game by Michael Lewis
  18. Google Hacks: 100 Industrial-Strength Tips & Tools by Tara Calishain, Rael Dornfest
  19. Living History by Hillary Rodham Clinton
  20. The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference by Malcolm Gladwell
  21. » Neuromancer by William Gibson
  22. Why Girls Are Weird: A Novel by Pamela Ribon
  23. Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America by Barbara Ehrenreich
  24. Linked: The New Science of Networks by Albert-Lászó Barabási
  25. » American Gods by Neil Gaiman
  26. The Lovely Bones: A Novel by Alice Sebold
  27. Guns, Germs, and Steel: The Fates of Human Societies by Jared Diamond
  28. Emergence: The Connected Lives of Ants, Brains, Cities, and Software by Steven Johnson
  29. The Weblog Handbook: Practical Advice on Creating and Maintaining Your Blog by Rebecca Blood
  30. What Liberal Media? The Truth About Bias and the News by Eric Alterman
  31. Blogging: Genius Strategies for Instant Web Content by Biz Stone
  32. A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson
  33. The Great Unraveling: Losing Our Way in the New Century by Paul Krugman
  34. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay by Michael Chabon
  35. Big Lies: The Right-Wing Propaganda Machine and How It Distorts the Truth by Joe Conason
  36. A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers
  37. Small Pieces Loosely Joined: A Unified Theory of the Web by David Weinberger
  38. » The Diamond Age: Or, a Young Lady’s Illustrated Primer by Neal Stephenson
  39. » Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Book 5) by J.K. Rowling
  40. » Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  41. » Good Omens by Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett
  42. » Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
  43. » Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid by Douglas R. Hofstadter
  44. » Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card
  45. Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
  46. » Catch 22 by Joseph Heller
  47. The Complete Far Side by Gary Larson, Steve Martin
  48. Microserfs by Douglas Coupland
  49. The Language Police: How Pressure Groups Restrict What Students Learn by Diane Ravitch
  50. What Should I Do with My Life? by Po Bronson
  51. Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner
  52. » Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
  53. Reefer Madness: Sex, Drugs, and Cheap Labor in the American Black Market by Eric Schlosser
  54. We Blog: Publishing Online with Weblogs by Paul Bausch, Matthew Haughey, Meg Hourihan
  55. The Best Democracy Money Can Buy: The Truth About Corporate Cons, Globalization and High-Finance Fraudsters by Greg Palast
  56. The Corrections: A Novel by Jonathan Franzen
  57. Bushwhacked: Life in George W. Bush’s America by Molly Ivins, Lou Dubose
  58. Choke by Chuck Palahniuk
  59. We’ve Got Blog: How Weblogs Are Changing Our Culture by Editors of Perseus Publishing, Rebecca Blood
  60. Beyond Fear: Thinking Sensibly About Security in an Uncertain World by Bruce Schneier
  61. » Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk
  62. The Clinton Wars by Sidney Blumenthal
  63. Six Degrees: The Science of a Connected Age by Duncan J. Watts
  64. » Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
  65. » Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
  66. Jennifer Government: A Novel by Max Barry
  67. » Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Book 4) by J. K. Rowling
  68. Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers by Mary Roach
  69. The Cluetrain Manifesto: The End of Business as Usual by Christopher Locke, Rick Levine, Doc Searls, David Weinberger
  70. High Fidelity by Nick Hornby
  71. Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood
  72. The Handmaid’s Tale: A Novel by Margaret Atwood
  73. » Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire
  74. Design Patterns by Erich Gamma, Richard Helm, Ralph Johnson, John Vlissides
  75. » Dune by Frank Herbert
  76. Under the Banner of Heaven: A Story of Violent Faith by Jon Krakauer
  77. The Threatening Storm: The Case for Invading Iraq by Kenneth M. Pollack
  78. Eric Meyer on CSS: Mastering the Language of Web Design by Eric A. Meyer
  79. Life of Pi by Yann Martel
  80. The Hours: A Novel by Michael Cunningham
  81. Diary: A Novel by Chuck Palahniuk
  82. Wolves of the Calla (The Dark Tower, Book 5) by Stephen King, Bernie Wrightson
  83. The Devil Wears Prada: A Novel by Lauren Weisberger
  84. Essential Blogging by Shelley Powers, Cory Doctorow, J. Scott Johnson, Mena G. Trott, Benjamin Trott, Rael Dornfest
  85. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  86. How to Be Good by Nick Hornby
  87. Prey: A Novel by Michael Crichton
  88. Memoirs of a Geisha: A Novel by Arthur Golden
  89. The Design of Everyday Things by Donald A. Norman
  90. The Skeptical Environmentalist: Measuring the Real State of the World by Bjorn Lomborg
  91. Seabiscuit: An American Legend by Laura Hillenbrand
  92. » The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
  93. Hey Nostradamus! A Novel by Douglas Coupland
  94. Don’t Make Me Think: A Common Sense Approach to Web Usability by Steve Krug
  95. On the Road by Jack Kerouac
  96. Naked by David Sedaris
  97. Rush Limbaugh Is a Big Fat Idiot by Al Franken
  98. The Substance of Style: How the Rise of Aesthetic Value Is Remaking Commerce, Culture, and Consciousness by Virginia Postrel
  99. Seven Habits Of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
  100. The Future of Freedom: Illiberal Democracy at Home and Abroad by Fareed Zakaria

There’s a few books here listed twice (The Life of Pi, Harry Potter) — I think that’s just a side effect of Amazon carrying both paperback and hardcover versions of the book, so both were linked to enough to show up on the list at different spots.

Search inside!

Search Inside Lolita?

Wow — I entirely missed Zeldman’s original post about this, but Kirsten just pointed out a hilarious little side effect of Amazon’s addition of “Search Inside!” or “Look Inside!” text to book cover images featuring their full text search feature.

As if the term ‘Lolita’ didn’t attract enough pervs already, now we have little things like this to feed the obsession.

More amusing instances of this can be found on Kirsten’s post, or at Another Pointless Dotcom.

iTunes: “Fun With Drugs” by Velvet Acid Christ from the album Fun With Knives (1999, 5:25).