But what about ‘janitor’?

…due to what is described as an “unfortunate error in translation,” the Spanish version of Windows XP “gave users an option to select their gender from not specified, male, or ‘bitch.'” Uh, whoops.

As the Apple Turns, while pointing out various Microsoft geographical and linguistic gaffes.

Incidentally, the title of this post involves an old bit of wisdom passed down from my father to me, in which it was imparted that there are actually three sexes in the human race. This little-known fact can be verified in nearly any large public building simply by strolling past the public restrooms, where you are likely to see three doors: male, female, and janitor.

iTunes: “Edie (Ciao Baby)” by Cult, The from the album Sonic Temple (1989, 4:46).

Hempfest 2004

Skull

I spent some time today wandering around this year’s Hempfest. I’ve avoided this particular Seattle festival for the past few years I’ve been down here, mostly because of my personal opinions regarding pot. Today, though, I had nothing else planned, and figured it might be worth wandering down with my camera for some peoplewatching.

As for the event itself…well, I can’t honestly say I was very surprised by the attendant crowds. Virtually every stereotype imaginable when dealing with the hemp/pot communities was there, plus all the requisite political hangers-on. Stoners, hippies, thugs, freaks, wierdos, Democrats, Libertarians, Socialists — you name it, that subculture was represented somewhere. Not to mention the ultra-right-wing religious proselytizers.

You poor sick miserable bunch

Is it any wonder so many people have such a dim view of Christianity when these bigoted idiots are the most visible representatives of the religion most of the time? I’ll give them points for perseverance, but that’s about it.

I didn’t bother to listen to any of the speakers I passed on the various stages, and for the most part, none of the few bands that were playing when I wandered by caught my ear enough for me to stop and listen. I did manage to catch a few minutes of a bellydancing performance on one of the stages, though.

Bellydancing

I only ended up sticking around for a couple hours, though, as — speaking of stereotypes — today’s cloudy skies finally started raining. It wasn’t enough rain to really be that much of a bother, but as I didn’t have anything along with me to protect the camera, I decided it was time enough to find my way home. Besides, walking through another thick cloud of marijuana smoke every few minutes was starting to get to be a bit much for me.

All in all, not a bad afternoon, though. Had the weather been a bit better, I probably would have stuck around a bit longer and taken a few more pictures. I’m trying to get over an ingrained resistance to taking pictures of random people, and festivals like this can be a good place to work on that. It’s not an easy thing for me to do, as I’m always at some level afraid that whoever I’m aiming the camera at will get offended, or make the assumption that I’m some sort of creepy voyeuristic freak, or some such thing, but as “still lifes” and buildings get a bit boring after a while, I’m going to keep working on it.

Dancers

iTunes: “My Mind is My Enemy (20,00 Volts of Stimulation Focused)” by Khan, Praga from the album My Mind is My Enemy/Luv U Still (1998, 4:12).

Just stop already!

Okay, okay, okay.

I’m a fan of the Nightmare on Elm Street series (conditionally — films one, three, and seven are good, the others range from just silly to downright bad).

I’ve only seen the first of the Friday the Thirteenth series, and I enjoyed it (though my only jump was right at the end).

I was even pleasantly surprised by the Freddy vs. Jason crossover film — it was silly and dumb, but very enjoyably so, and not nearly as bad as I’d expected it to be.

I’m also a big fan of Sam Raimi’s Evil Dead series.

But come on people.

Freddy vs. Jason…vs. Ash?!?!?

This is just ridiculous — and not a good kind of ridiculous.

If this actually gets made, I just hope they all die. No resurrections. No sequels. There obviously isn’t anything more that can actually be done with any of the characters that actually involves any amount of creativity, so just let them die already.

Ugh.

(via Ryan)

iTunes: “Swim” by Spahn Ranch from the album Virgin Voices: A Tribute to Madonna Vol. 1 (1999, 4:36).

M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village

A few weeks ago, Prairie and I went out to see M. Night Shyamalan‘s latest, The Village. I’ve been holding off on writing about it for a bit, as I wanted to let it rumble around in my head for a bit — I knew what my first impression was, but as I’ve had something of an on-again, off-again opinion of Shyamalan’s films, I didn’t want to rush into a review fresh after seeing the film.

(Honestly, I don’t know how professional film reviewers do it. When I go into a film for the first time, I tend to turn my brain off, letting myself sink into the world the film creates, not bothering to pick it apart or watch for inconsistencies. Most of the time, this works pretty well, and I thoroughly enjoy myself while watching the movie — and, as a consequence, I’ve come out of some royal stinkers thinking that they were pretty darn fun right off the bat. Once I’ve had a few hours or days to actually process what I’d watched, I’ll start re-evaluating on a more critical level. But right after that first viewing? It’s probably not best to trust my first impressions…)

However, after turning it over in my head for a while, and discussing it with Prairie and her sister this weekend, I’m pretty sure that I can stand by my first impression — The Village is by far my favorite of Shyamalan’s films.

Probably the primary thing that Shyamalan has become famous for is the “twist” in his films — the final revelation that either helps to explain what’s been happening in the film (The Sixth Sense) or simply wraps everything up in a less-than-expected manner (Signs) — Unbreakable fell somewhere in between, from what I remember.

The strength of The Village is that unlike his prior films, where the story sometimes seemed to exist solely as an excuse to get to the final revelation, it instead focuses far more on the situations and interactions of the characters in the body of the film. When the film’s “secret” is finally revealed, I wasn’t surprised in the least — I had been fairly sure of the gimmick for a good portion of the movie by this point — but in a pleasant contrast to his earlier films, this didn’t lessen my appreciation of the film at all. Where the prior films in Shyamalan’s oeuvre all walked us step-by-step to the inevitable (in retrospect) ending, The Village could have existed quite well as a character study if the gimmick was known beforehand.

As the movie’s been out for a while, I’m going to go ahead and continue rambling — if you haven’t seen it yet, you may want to avoid the rest of this post. Here, of course, the gimmick is that what’s been presented as a mid-1800’s Quaker-ish society is in actuality a modern community, living an isolated existence on a private sanctuary, presented to the outside world as a wildlife preserve. Only the village elders know of the outside modern world, and they use a combination of boogyman stories and frightening costumes to keep the younger members of the community from straying into the woods and discovering the world outside the sanctuary’s walls.

As I mentioned earlier, the final revelation wasn’t a surprise for me at all. I’d had an odd feeling throughout the film that there was something “off” about the community, and I’d become fairly certain that we weren’t actually dealing with the pre-technological world that was being presented to us. Prairie and I spent some time discussing what it was that tipped us off, and we both think that it was the use of language that did it. All of the dialogue felt a little stilted, especially when any of the village elders were speaking, as if there was a little too much conscious thought behind their conversation — as if they weren’t entirely comfortable speaking as they were (slightly odd phrasing, and a very noticeable lack of any contractions at all).

To some, this may have come off as stiff acting, and I really can’t argue with that conclusion at all. However, it’s my feeling that it wasn’t the actors who were stiff, but that it was the characters — that one of the decisions made when the community was first established was to revert to a perceived earlier usage of the English language. As the founding members already had many years of “normal”, 60’s- and 70’s- era English usage behind them, they weren’t able to ever entirely familiarize themselves with the more formal usage they adopted. The younger members of the community, having grown up with this usage, were more comfortable with the speech patterns, and didn’t show the same slight hesitation in their conversation.

What was far more interesting to me, though, and the reason that I enjoyed the film as much as I did, was the interactions between the elders as their carefully constructed Utopia starts to crack. They had set up their community in an effort to escape the evils that they had dealt with in their prior lives — the abuses, violence, and murders of the modern world — but evil is never so easily escaped. Just as the eternal optimist will point out that no matter how bad, everyone has the potential to do good with their life, the opposite is also true: we all have the potential to do evil, be it to ourselves or to others. While the community in The Village managed to avoid the heartache of violence for a time, it was bound to reappear eventually.

As often happens, of course, the very technique that the elders devised to keep their village isolated — the fictitious dangerous creatures in the woods beyond the village’s borders — was a key part of the eventual threat to their adopted way of life. In creating their private Utopia free of any internal evil, they enforced their edict to stay within the village’s borders by creating an external evil. With the same hubris that haunts so many of mankind’s attempts to mold the universe to an ideal, they assumed that they could control this evil — after all, at its heart it was no more than scary bedtime stories and a few frightening-looking costumes.

The borders between an imaginary evil and an actual evil are often far more permeable than is comfortable to admit, however, and by introducing that concept into the community — no matter how safely they thought they did so — it was inevitable that eventually, something would happen to cause those borders to start slipping away. Within the context of the film, it was the jealous love of a mentally disabled member of the community, spurred on by his discovery of one of the creature costumes hidden underneath the floorboards of one of the buildings. Had that not been the situation, however, at some point some other situation would have arisen to threaten the stability of the village. To attempt to create an environment free of evil is a worthy enough endeavor — but to then introduce the very concept of evil as a controlling factor makes the experiment nothing more than extremely foolish idealism at best.

I was impressed that when push came to shove, it was the founder of the community who finally made the decision to risk the community’s exposure by allowing his daughter to travel through the woods to seek help (a risk admittedly tempered by her blindness — but a risk none the less). All too often, the creators of such schemes are shown to be so wrapped up in the idealism of their creation that they steadfastly refuse to entertain any idea that might risk toppling the house of cards they’ve so carefully assembled. Instead, while the rest of the village elders continued to hem and haw, afraid to face the possibility of contact with the world they had left behind, the very man who’d brought them all together and enabled them to create their own private little world was willing and able to put his love for his daughter and his family above his ideals.

All in all, I’m quite impressed with Shyamalan’s work in The Village. Here’s hoping that he’s learned that a movie that exists solely to set up a gag may be enjoyable once or twice, but one that has an actual story to tell beyond the gag will be far more satisfying all around.

iTunes: “We Are Back” by LFO from the album Best of Rave, The Vol. 1 (1991, 4:48).

Whoever Wins…We Lose

No, I haven’t seen it yet, but it appears that as much as I was hoping this wouldn’t happen, it has: Alien vs. Predator is a dud.

Surprised? Not in the least. Disappointed, though — there was a lot of potential here.

Too bad that when they came up with the “Whoever wins, we lose,” tagline, they were apparently referring to the fans.

iTunes: “House on Fire” by Arkarna from the album Dr. Martens Music Sampler (1997, 3:25).

Saft: Everything Safari should have, but doesn’t yet

Thanks to a mention by Dori, I’ve just discovered Saft, a wonderful little add-on for Safari. While the headline on Saft’s site promotes full-screen browsing as its main feature — something that really doesn’t concern me all that much — there’s so much more packed into this little piece of software.

Head on over to Saft’s Usage page and check out everything it can do. If you spend any appreciable amount of time in Safari on a day-to-day basis, it’s well worth the download.

iTunes: “Strangers (Live)” by Portishead from the album Roseland NYC (2000, 5:20).

Comments from the Peanut Gallery

I spent a little time last night reorganizing the blogroll on the site. Actually, I split it into two, and added a bunch of links.

Since I had the phrase “comments from the peanut gallery” running through my head for no discernible reason whatsoever, I went into the e-mail folder where I dump all the comments that I receive on the site, sorted them all by sender, and started scrolling through. Anytime I saw an address with a good number of comments, I snagged any URL that was left with the comments, and added them to the new ‘Peanut Gallery’ blogroll in the sidebar.

So, in theory, I should have caught most, if not all, of the most frequent visitors that leave comments, as long as they have a site to link to. If I’ve missed anyone, or if for some reason I’ve linked to you and you’d rather I didn’t, please let me know!

The next step is making sure that all of those sites are tossed into NetNewsWire…

iTunes: “Gumbo” by Phish from the album A Live One (1995, 5:14).

Analogy

Microsoft Windows : computer security :: George Bush : national security

(Yes, it’s probably extremely flawed. At quarter to two in the morning, it made me laugh when it popped into my head.)

iTunes: “Nocturnal Transmission” by BT from the album Ima (1996, 8:36).

Ebert’s obsession with Brittany Murphy

Mike pointed to Ebert’s review of “Little Black Book” today, pointing out an entertaining anecdote about actress Brittany Murphy.

As for Brittany Murphy, for me it goes back to the 2003 Independent Spirit Awards, held the day before the Oscars in a big tent on the beach at Santa Monica. Murphy was assigned to present one of the awards. Her task was to read the names of the five nominees, open an envelope and reveal the name of the winner. This she turned into an opportunity for screwball improvisational comedy, by pretending she could not follow this sequence, not even after the audience shouted instructions and the stage manager came out to whisper in her ear not once but twice. There were those in the audience who were dumbfounded by her stupidity. I was dumbfounded by her brilliance. I had a front-row seat, and was convinced her timing was too good, her double-takes too perfect, her pauses too wicked, to even possibly be authentic. She was taking a routine task and turning it into the opportunity to steal a scene and leave everybody in the tent chattering about her performance. You can’t screw up that entertainingly by accident. You have to know exactly what you’re doing.

After reading it, I was a little curious as to whether any video footage of the event might be floating around the ‘net, and started Googling for ‘brittany murphy independent spirit awards’. As it turns out, this is at least the third time Ebert has mentioned Brittany’s pseudo-stumble.

From his April 4, 2003 review of “Spun”:

Murphy made quite an impact at the Independent Spirit Awards by being unable to master the concept of reading the five nominees before opening the envelope, despite two helpful visits from the stage manager and lots of suggestions from the audience, but with Murphy, you always kind of wonder if she doesn’t know exactly what she’s doing.

And from his August 15, 2003 review of “Updown Girls”:

The theory is that Brittany Murphy is trying to channel Marilyn Monroe, but as I watched “Uptown Girls,” another name came to mind: Lucille Ball. Murphy has a kind of divine ineptitude that moves beyond Marilyn’s helplessness into Lucy’s dizzy lovability. She is like a magnet for whoops! moments.

I remember her as a presenter at the 2003 Independent Spirit Awards, where her assignment was to read the names of five nominees, open an envelope and read the winner. This she was unable to do, despite two visits by a stage manager who whispered helpful suggestions into her ear. She kept trying to read every nominee as the winner, and when she finally arrived triumphantly at the real winner, she inspired no confidence that she had it right.

Some thought she was completely clueless, or worse. I studied her timing and speculated that she knew exactly what she was doing, and that while it took no skill at all to get it right, it took a certain genius to get it so perfectly wrong. She succeeded in capturing the attention of every person in that distracted and chattering crowd, and I recalled “Lucy” shows where everyone in a restaurant would suddenly be looking at her.

Something tells me she made an impression on Ebert. ;)

I’d still like to see a video clip of this at some point, though I had no luck digging one up. I’m also a bit more curious about Brittany, who I’d never (to my memory) actually heard of before now.

iTunes: “Nighttrain” by Public Enemy from the album Apocalypse 91…The Enemy Strikes Black (1991, 3:27).

It’s not all bad, really!

Last month, I mentioned that I’d been in contact with a magazine reporter who was working on a story about weblogs and some of the potential pitfalls that can come about when recording your life online for the world to see. As I mentioned at the time, while I at first wasn’t terribly concerned about the tone of the article, as our conversation progressed, I started to worry that it was going to end up all gloom-and-doom.

It appears that Anil has also been contacted by a reporter working on a similar story (possibly the same reporter, or another reporter also working on the story for the same publication, though I can’t be absolutely sure about that), and he ended up having some of the same reservations that I did. In his response to the reporter who contacted him, he expressed a desire shared by myself and, I’m sure, many others in the weblogging world: rather than focusing solely on the things that go wrong, that the media also look at the things that go right, and just why we all keep our weblogs going even in the face of the potential downsides.

One thing I would suggest is considering a, well, more uplifting angle. There have been an awful lot of “blogs can cost you your job!” or “make money fast with blogs!” stories, and very few that cover the positive reasons people have weblogs.

For a lot of your audience, this is their first impression of what weblogs can be, and frankly, if they were all about dire consequences, there wouldn’t be millions of people publishing weblogs every day.

Most of the people in my social circle have met their spouses/significant others, gotten apartments, gotten jobs, made friends, or (in my case) all of the above because of their weblogs. All that plus they get to participate in a new medium instead of just passively consuming media.

From what I know of [name of publication], the audience is one that appreciates a good positive human story, and it’s also much more likely that you’ll get some good cooperation or participation from people in the weblog realm who can help strengthen your story.

I’ve just sent a link to Anil’s post to the reporter I’ve been talking with, in case we are dealing with separate people. With any luck, should this article eventually appear, there will be a bit more to it than mere horror stories.