My Movie Rating System

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For no particular reason that I can come up with, I was thinking over how I rate movies, and attempting to quantify the basic reasoning for each star of a five-star rating system. I think I’ve pretty much nailed it down.

* (one star): Two hours of my life that I won’t get back.
* * (two stars): Not a total waste of time, if the viewing cost is low enough (free coupon, someone else is renting it and I happen to be around to see it, a good Netflix plan with relatively high turnover).
* * * (three stars): Worth a rent.
* * * * (four stars): Worth seeing in the theater (at a matinee, or at an evening show if I’m either excited enough by the particular movie or feeling rich enough to afford it), possibly worth purchasing (preferably secondhand or after a while so the price has dropped, but perhaps at full price if I think it’s on the high side of four stars).
* * * * * (five stars): A keeper. Worth seeing in the theater if possible, worth owning at whatever price I think is reasonable.

Of course, as with any rating system, there’s some amount of variability, and my movie collection certainly isn’t entirely comprised of 4- and 5-star movies (Star Trek V? Honestly, it’s about a 2-star movie. But it’s Star Trek, and I’m a nerd and a completist). But on the whole, I think that’s a pretty good overview of my thought process.

Emergency Preparedness

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It’s a bit late for SNOWPOCALYPSE 2008, but for future reference, a handy guide of what to do…

…in the case of Snow:

  • Obtain De-icer and chains for your car.
  • Know your tire size, in case you need to replace a broken chain.
  • Make sure your tires are at recommended air capacity.
  • Urge the administration to close your schools, even if it only might snow.
  • Carry a small amount of sand in your car so you can get traction if you get stuck.
  • Remember: Snow kills people on contact, so avoid it at all cost.

…in the case of Rain:

  • Make sure to pack up your umbrella!
  • Wear rubber boots, or “Slicker Kicks” as I like to call them.
  • Don’t listen to depressing music while it’s raining.
  • Increase your following distance to at least 3 seconds.
  • Call your mother. It’s been a while.
  • Thank god it’s not snowing too.

…in the case of Snow/Rain:

  • Scream at God, asking: “Why? Why, God, why?”
  • Rain water is still made of water, which is able to freeze.
  • Light your car on fire to thaw any ice on the road below your car.
  • Before driving somewhere, call ahead and let them know you will be 27 to 50 hours late.

…in the case of nuclear war:

  • Evacuate the area directly beneath atomic bomb impact.
  • Remember the triangle! Time, Distance and Shielding.
  • Ventilate and cool any lead shelters you habitate with ice and machine guns.
  • Food is important. If you run out of food, eat the weak.
  • Wear Fire Protection.
  • Charge the batteries on your VATS.

…in the case of ice weasel attack:

  • Do not make sudden moves around or near ice weasels.
  • Try to lift the snowmobile off of your broken carcass.

…in the case a monkey flies out of my ass and claws for your eyes:

  • Shield your eyes with metal objects, such as a frying pan, or bent forks.
  • Should you trap the monkey in the closet, do not open your closet door.

…in the case of the dead rising from their graves:

  • Do not shine your light on the Witch. She is tougher than she looks.
  • Shove a boomer before you shoot him, so he does not splash on you.
  • If you are on point, crouch so your teammate can shoot over your head.
  • Avoid shooting a car with an alarm. The alarm will attract the horde.

(found here)

Links for December 16th through December 17th

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Sometime between December 16th and December 17th, I thought this stuff was interesting. You might think so too!

  • TIME’s Person of the Year 2008: Barack Obama: "…two years from now, I want the American people to be able to say, 'Government's not perfect; there are some things Obama does that get on my nerves. But you know what? I feel like the government's working for me. I feel like it's accountable. I feel like it's transparent. I feel that I am well informed about what government actions are being taken. I feel that this is a President and an Administration that admits when it makes mistakes and adapts itself to new information, that believes in making decisions based on facts and on science as opposed to what is politically expedient.' Those are some of the intangibles that I hope people two years from now can claim."
  • PHOTOS: Cyanide Millipede, Huge Spider Among New Species: They're not kidding about the "huge" spider — we're talking a 12" (one foot) legspan here. EEEP!!!!!
  • Aegisub: If programming languages were religions…: Perl would be Voodoo – An incomprehensible series of arcane incantations that involve the blood of goats and permanently corrupt your soul. Often used when your boss requires you to do an urgent task at 21:00 on friday night.
  • Save Handmade Toys From the CPSIA: Place your vote here to help keep handmade toys from being banned, thanks to poor quality control in Chinese toys necessitating stricter controls on imported toys.
  • Apple Announces Last Year of Christmas: CUPERTINO, California—December 16, 2008—Apple® today announced that this is the last year for Christmas. Philip Schiller, Apple’s senior vice president of Worldwide Product Marketing, spoke at a joint press conference held with Santa Claus at the North Pole this morning. He announced: "Apple has been honored to work with the North Pole the last several years to make Christmas possible, however, we have decided together that this is the last year for Christmas."
  • The Periodic Table of Awesoments: In 300 B.C., years before the birth of black Jesus, Aristole postulated that all good things were made of "win." That was a pretty good guess, but he was drunk and probably also having an orgy. Modern day awesominers know there are actually 118 fundamental "awesoments" that compose all good things. The Periodic table of Awesoments can be a very useful tool. It's designed to show the relationships between awesoments, and often one can even predict how awesoments interact simply by their positions on the table.
  • Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds” Barbie® Doll: In 1963, Alfred Hitchcock, the Master of Suspense, gave us a tale of terror not soon forgotten in his film “The Birds.” Dressed in a re-creation of the stylish green skirt-suit worn by the film’s ill-fated heroine in an iconic scene, Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds” Barbie® Doll celebrates the 45th anniversary of the acclaimed film. From the doll’s classic ensemble to the perfectly painted expression to the accompanying black birds, every aspect captures the film’s infamous appeal.
  • World’s First Computer Rebuilt, Rebooted After 2,000 Years: A dictionary-size assemblage of 37 interlocking dials crafted with the precision and complexity of a 19th-century Swiss clock, the Antikythera mechanism was used for modeling and predicting the movements of the heavenly bodies as well as the dates and locations of upcoming Olympic games.

Links for December 15th through December 16th

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Sometime between December 15th and December 16th, I thought this stuff was interesting. You might think so too!

  • Apple Announces Its Last Year at Macworld: Apple® today announced that this year is the last year the company will exhibit at Macworld Expo. Philip Schiller, Apple’s senior vice president of Worldwide Product Marketing, will deliver the opening keynote for this year’s Macworld Conference & Expo, and it will be Apple’s last keynote at the show. (Wow…if this came from anywhere other than Apple's own PR site, I'd think it was a hoax.)
  • Drillers Accidentally Create First Live Magma Observatory: Drillers accidentally hit a pocket of molten rock underneath a working geothermal energy field in Hawaii, a lucky break for geologists that could allow them to map the geological plumbing that created everything we know as land. The unprecedented discovery could act as a "magma observatory," allowing scientists to test their theories about how processes transformed the molten rock below Earth's surface into the rocky crust that humans live on today.
  • The Crow Reboot: Crow Reboot Will End In Eyelinery Tears: Oh, this is just bad: the guy who directed The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen wants to "reboot" The Crow, and, "whereas Proyas' original was gloriously gothic and stylized, the new movie will be realistic, hard-edged and mysterious, almost documentary-style." (sigh) Why are there so few good remakes of bad movies out there, and so many bad remakes of good movies? Why are there even so many damn remakes? What happened to originality?
  • BURGER KING® FLAME™: "Body spray of seduction, with a hint of flame-broiled meat." Oh, my lord. Amusingly, and really frighteningly, this doesn't seem to be a joke. A special scent from Burger King…because nothing says, "Take me now, you big, strapping hunk of man meat!" like the smell of the Whopper. Or maybe they're just b(r)oiling the message down to, "Eat me!"
  • The WSDOT Blog: The Washington State Department of Transportation has a weblog. I've been following their Flickr account for a while, but just found the blog and their Twitter account today.

Links for December 11th through December 15th

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Sometime between December 11th and December 15th, I thought this stuff was interesting. You might think so too!

  • 6 Insane Discoveries That Science Can’t Explain: We like to feel superior to the people who lived centuries ago, what with their shitty mud huts and curing colds by drilling a hole in their skulls. But we have to give them credit: They left behind some artifacts that have left the smartest of modern scientists scratching their heads. For instance, you have the following enigmas that we believe were created for no other purpose than to fuck with future generations.
  • Moratorium declared on Capitol displays: The moratorium applies to Westboro's application, along with pending requests for a Buddhist display, a Jewish banner, a mannequin of Satan holding a statement against atheists and wishing them a merry Christmas, an aluminum pole in celebration of the invented holiday of Festivus, and a "Flying Spaghetti Monster Holiday Display."
  • Google Zeitgeist 2008: As the year comes to a close, it's time to look at the big events, memorable moments and emerging trends that captivated us in 2008. As it happens, studying the aggregation of the billions of search queries that people type into the Google search box gives us a glimpse into the zeitgeist — the spirit of the times. We've compiled some of the highlights from Google searches around the globe and hope you enjoy looking back as much as we do.
  • Hold onto that e-waste just a little bit longer: If you've been waiting forever to unload that old TV or computer, Jan. 1 is your lucky day. A new state law requires electronics manufacturers to start safely recycling four of the most-discarded items, with no charge to consumers. Washington's law is the first in the nation to require electronics producers to pay for the whole process.
  • 10 useful iPhone tips & tricks: I’m sure that many of you are “power users” and probably know most of these tips and tricks. But I suspect that a lot of you are more casual iPhone users and will find this list useful. Even our team members that I showed the draft of this post to (people I consider iPhone experts), all picked up at least a tip or two that they weren’t already aware of. So I’ll bet there’s something for everyone here…

Links for December 8th through December 11th

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Sometime between December 8th and December 11th, I thought this stuff was interesting. You might think so too!

  • 10 useful iPhone tips & tricks: I’m sure that many of you are “power users” and probably know most of these tips and tricks. But I suspect that a lot of you are more casual iPhone users and will find this list useful. Even our team members that I showed the draft of this post to (people I consider iPhone experts), all picked up at least a tip or two that they weren’t already aware of. So I’ll bet there’s something for everyone here…
  • Austenbook: Jane Bennet finds herself very unwell. :( //Elizabeth Bennet is going to stay at Netherfield with Jane. // Louisa Hurst saw Elizabeth Bennet's petticoat and is absolutely certain it was six inches deep in mud. // Elizabeth Bennet is improving her mind by extensive reading.
  • Chinese ‘classical poem’ was brothel ad: A respected research institute wanted Chinese classical texts to adorn its journal, something beautiful and elegant, to illustrate a special report on China. Instead, it got a racy flyer extolling the lusty details of stripping housewives in a brothel.
  • Writing My Twitter Etiquette Article: 14 Ways to Use Twitter Politely by Margaret Mason – The Morning News: One drunk tweet might be amusing. Unfortunately, when you’re drunk or high, Twitter is like a can of Pringles. You don’t want to break the seal. One drunk tweet leads to 20 poorly spelled missives on one amazing house party. If you think texting your ex is embarrassing the next morning, try texting all of them.
  • If Gamers Ran The World: They’re 45 in 2018 when they stand for office – that means they were born in 1973. They would have been four when Taito released Space Invaders came out; seven when Pac Man came out. In 1985, when they were 12, Nintendo would launch the NES in the west. At 18, just as they would have been heading to University, the first NHL game came out for the Genesis/Megadrive and might consumed many a night in the dorm. At 22, the Playstation was launched. At 26, they could have bought a PS2 at launch; at 31, they might have taken up World of Warcraft with their friends. They would have been a gamer all their lives. Not someone who once played videogames, trotting out the same anecdote about “playing Asteroids once” in interviews; someone for whom games were another part of their lives, a primary, important medium. Someone who understood games. (This is my generation — exactly, as I was born in 1973 — that he's talking about here. Sometimes I wonder how I became a geek without being a gamer.)

Traditional Marriage

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If we are to let the Bible define what “traditional marriage” should look like, then our marriage laws should be amended as such:

  1. Marriage in the United States shall consist of a union between one man and one or more women. (Gen 29:17-28; II Sam 3:2-5)

  2. Marriage shall not impede a man’s right to take concubines in addition to his wife or wives. (II Sam 5:13; I Kings 11:3; II Chron 11:21)

  3. A marriage shall be considered valid only if the wife is a virgin. If the wife is not a virgin, she shall be executed. (Deut 22:13-21)

  4. Marriage of a believer and a non-believer shall be forbidden. (Gen 24:3; Num 25:1-9; Ezra 9:12; Neh 10:30)

  5. Since marriage is for life, neither this Constitution nor the constitution of any State, nor any state or federal law, shall be construed to permit divorce. (Deut 22:19; Mark 10:9)

  6. If a married man dies without children, his brother shall marry the widow. If he refuses to marry his brother’s widow or deliberately does not give her children, he shall pay a fine of one shoe and be otherwise punished in a manner to be determined by law. (Gen 38:6-10; Deut 25:5-10)

  7. In lieu of marriage, if there are no acceptable men in your town, it is required that you get your dad drunk and have sex with him (even if he had previously offered you up as a sex toy to men young and old), tag-teaming with any sisters you may have. Of course, this rule applies only if you are female. (Gen 19:31-36)

(this particular incarnation by gladkov, via Daily Kos)

Comcast Clarification

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Looks like I’ve got my answer: our Limited Basic service shouldn’t change. Here are the relevant tweets:

@djwudi Limited basic will be channels below 30 will not need a box. What channel number are you concerned about? #

@djwudi This isn’t happening immediately; it’s where we’re eventually moving. As you said, it’s seperate from the FCC broadcast transition. #

@ShaunaCausey @comcastcares You two are fast! :) I know we’ll miss 99 (CBUT), they were great during the Olympics, and we’ve kept watching. #

@ShaunaCausey @comcastcares My concern: there aren’t many channels above 29 on Limited Basic, but having them go poof isn’t “unaffected”. #

@djwudi Good point. you will still get CBUT. If you are a “limited” customer, you will not lose any channels. 75-99 WILL still be there. #

Sounds like a good end to this particular adventure to me!

Update: There have been some additions to the Seattle Times article that cover this same information. Here’s the relevant sections of their article:

Q: What about public access channels above 29? (NEW)

A: Comcast must still offer a handful of public access channels in analog format, per its franchise agreements. Tony Perez of Seattle’s cable office said that in Seattle, those channels include 75 (KCTS Plus) 76 (UW 2 TV); 77 (SCAN, the public access channel) and perhaps a few more.

Q: What about Canadian public television channel 99 (CBUT)? (NEW)

A: It will remain available to “limited basic” customers, spokesman Steve Kipp said in an email: “In addition to C-SPAN, C-SPAN2, the local broadcast channels and the local government and education channels, the Limited Basic lineup includes: Northwest Cable News, ION, Discovery Channel, KMYQ, KBCB, KHCV, QVC, HSN, KWDK, Hallmark Channel, KTBW, TVW, Univision, The Weather Channel and CBUT.”

Kipp said the limited basic channel numbers won’t change: “As for channel locations here, they will remain the same so the Limited Basic channels that are in the 75 to 99 range would remain the same.”

Comcast Confusion

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Well, maybe this transition thing isn’t as cleared up as I thought.

An update to the earlier article about Comcast’s transition to (nearly) all-digital broadcasting went online, and it seems to be contradicting what I was told earlier. Here’s the relevant part of the new article (added emphasis is mine):

Comcast is switching channels higher than 29 to digital format and requiring all televisions to have some sort of cable box to receive those channels. For “expanded basic” customers who don’t have cable boxes, the company will provide a free box. It also will provide two free adapters that expanded and digital customers can use on additional TVs that don’t have a box. Limited basic customers — who only receive channels 2 to 29 — won’t be affected.

This seems to agree with my initial interpretation from the first article: that there will be no change in service for Limited Basic subscribers, and it’s only Expanded Basic customers that will be receiving cable boxes and/or DTAs. Looking again at the tweets I received yesterday from Shauna, I wonder about the wording of this one (again with added emphasis):

@djwudi Hi,Re:Comcast—You will not lose channels, you will actually get more. If you have basic cable, we’ll give you very small conver … #

The problem I’m seeing, and the potential breakdown in communication, is that “basic cable” could be interpreted two ways: Limited Basic (the package I have), and Expanded Basic (the package planned to get the new boxes).

Under Comcast’s current channel line up (which I can’t link to, given the joys of Comcast’s website), Limited Basic customers get channels 2-29 as stated in the article, but they also get 75-79, 99, a run of HD channels (which you would need a $6.50/mo HD box to receive: 104-107, 109-111 and 113), and four high-digit channels (115-117 and 119) that I’ve never seen, so I don’t know if they’re HD or if my TV just doesn’t pick them up. Based on the information provided so far, I can’t find a situation where Limited Basic subscribers “won’t be affected,” as stated in both articles from the Seattle Times. There appear to be two possible situations:

  1. As implied in my conversations on Twitter, Limited Basic customers will receive DTA boxes that will allow them to receive the current channel lineup, or

  2. After the transition, Limited Basic service will actually be reduced to only channels 2-29.

I’m going to continue poking at Comcast to see if I can get a solid answer to this, but at the moment it’s a little confusing.