Eclecticism

This is getting ridiculous.

Because I’m paranoid after all the issues I’ve been having so far, I just logged into UPS’s tracking site to check on the current state of my shipment.

May 9, 2005 12:39 P.M.: A SECOND DELIVERY CHANGE REQUEST WAS SUBMITTED FOR THIS PACKAGE.;THE RECEIVER REQUESTED THE PACKAGE BE DELIVERED TO AN ALTERNATE ADDRESS
May 9, 2005 6:06 P.M.: AS REQUESTED BY THE CUSTOMER, THE RECEIVER WILL PICKUP AT A UPS FACILITY WITHIN 5 BUSINESS DAYS;THE ADDRESS HAS BEEN CORRECTED. THE DELIVERY HAS BEEN RESCHEDULED

What.

The.

Fuck?!?

I really want to know what’s going on here. That first entry from 12:39pm is from when I talked to UPS, just before making my last post. That 6:06pm entry? Not the faintest clue, but it sure wasn’t me.

Even worse, I can’t do anything about it. If I click on the ‘Delivery Change Request’ link, I get the following message:

A Delivery Change Request cannot currently be performed on this package. For additional information, please call 1-800-811-1652 (Monday-Friday, 7:00 A.M. to Midnight Eastern Time and Saturday 7:30 A.M. to 9:00 P.M. Eastern Time).

And, of course, it’s too late to call the customer service center now.

Looks like the first thing I’m doing tomorrow morning after my alarm goes off is calling UPS and raising holy hell. Oh, joy.

Update: I just got up 2 hours early, at 4am, so I could call the service center as soon as they open at 7am on the East Coast. Just as I was told yesterday, I’ve been assured by a representative (who I did get a name from, this time) that even though it looks to me like the package is set to be held, it is actually on a truck, set for delivery to my workplace today. There’s a new entry on the tracking page…

May 9, 2005 6:38 P.M.: DESTINATION SCAN

…that, though it looks to me like it would mean that the package has been accepted by the UPS facility, I’ve been told actually means that it’s on the truck.

Hmmm. We’ll see.

(Just to be absolutely sure I just called back again, got a different customer service rep — whose name I wrote down — who told me the same thing as the first one did. That’s two different people who have told me that it’s on the truck to be delivered. Keeping my fingers crossed, but that’s at least slightly reassuring.)

For now, though…back to bed for another couple hours.

Update:

May 10, 2005 9:00 A.M.: DELIVERY

‘Bout damn time.

“Dream Lover” by Spacey, Kevin from the album Beyond the Sea (2004, 2:46).

I am so not happy with UPS right now. Not that I’ve ever been a big fan of theirs — historically, I’ve always had more trouble receiving packages shipped through them than getting packages shipped through FedEx — but it just keeps getting worse.

I pre-ordered my copy of Tiger a few weeks ago through Amazon, and chose their el-cheapo free shipping rate. A little slower, but it saves me a few bucks. The downside, though, is that it meant the box was shipped via UPS instead of the normal postal service (I’ve never quite figured out when Amazon decides to ship via the postal service and when they go with UPS, I’ve gotten packages both ways and haven’t seen the pattern yet).

Because I didn’t know that UPS was going to be involved, the shipping address was my apartment. While this works fine for postal packages, UPS invariably tries to deliver to my residence during work hours. It’s just a given. So, when I got the notice from Amazon that the box was on its way via UPS, I figured that I probably wouldn’t be home for the first delivery attempt…wasn’t thrilled, but that’s just the way it goes.

The day the box was supposed to arrive, I arranged with the building’s resident manager to sign for the package, and left a note on the door of the building authorizing UPS to leave the box with the manager. Of course, that didn’t work. I got home to find a UPS Infonotice waiting for me — apparently they need my signature. A little frustrating, but it was worth a shot.

So I call UPS to have the box re-routed to my work address so that it would be delivered today. While on the phone, the customer service rep I talked to was puzzled that my note was ignored, assuring me that that should have been enough. Apparently the driver disagreed, though, so whatever, and at 5:33pm we get things set up to have the box delivered to me at work today.

This morning, I checked in on the tracking notice on UPS’s site, and saw the following:

May 6, 2005 5:33 P.M.: A DELIVERY CHANGE REQUEST FOR THIS PACKAGE WILL BE PROCESSED;THE RECEIVER REQUESTED THE PACKAGE BE DELIVERED TO AN ALTERNATE ADDRESS
May 6, 2005 9:10 P.M.: AS REQUESTED BY THE CUSTOMER, THE RECEIVER WILL PICKUP AT A UPS FACILITY WITHIN 5 BUSINESS DAYS;AS REQUESTED, THE RECEIVER WILL PICKUP AT A UPS FACILITY AT THEIR CONVENIENCE. THIS MUST BE WITHIN 5 BUSINESS DAYS

Um…no, I don’t think so. My only call to UPS was at about 5:30 that afternoon as noted in the log. I don’t know who or where this 9:10pm call was from, but it wasn’t me. So, I call UPS and talk to one of their customer service reps, a very cheery-sounding woman who assures me that no, that’s incorrect, and my package is on the truck and set to be delivered to me at work. “You’re sure?” I ask, as that’s not what the website says, and yes, she’s sure. Okay, must be a glitch somewhere.

On lunch, I decide to see what the site says. It hasn’t changed, so I call UPS’s Infonotice phone system, where I hear a recorded message telling me that the package is sitting at the UPS facility waiting for me to pick it up. Not good — the reason I don’t want to go that route is the facility is somewhere over in the Beacon Hill/South Seattle area, which I can’t get to easily — and besides, that’s not what I asked for, and had been told this morning that this wasn’t going to happen.

I hit ‘0’ a few times until I finally get shunted over to a customer service rep. They, of course, can do absolutely nothing for me except re-route the package again to my work address, to be delivered tomorrow (apparently there’s absolutely no possible way to get the package to my workplace today). There’s nothing in the system that tells them anything about the 9:10pm call — they don’t even mark which customer service person made the change, as the system is set up so that people can call in from their cell phones, and there may not have been a customer service rep. I, of course, didn’t think to get the full name of the lady I talked to this morning (who apparently told me what I wanted to hear, and not what was actually going on), so there’s no way to figure out what went wrong there.

All in all, an incredibly frustrating experience. A mysterious 9:10pm call on Friday to hold the package for pickup that I didn’t make, and some twit this morning who didn’t tell me what was actually happening.

I’d originally planned to have the weekend to upgrade, doing a full drive wipe and install from scratch and then reinstalling all my apps for as clean a system as possible. With the first delay, I was now planning on upgrading tonight after work. Now, I’m pushed back again until tomorrow. Grrrr.

As the title says…there’s a reason UPS is pronounced ‘Oops!’

“Peace, Love and Grease (Hot Tracks)” by BT from the album Roadkill 2.19 (1997, 6:48).

And to Emily (Kevin’s wife), Aunt Susan, and Aunt Pam, too!

“Always Look On the Bright Side of Life” by Curry, Tim/McGrath, Michael/Ensemble from the album Spamalot (Original Broadway Cast) (2005, 4:29).