The Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Iraq

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There’s a creature in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy called the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.

Daft as a hairbrush, the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal is arguably the most insanely idiotically dense creature in existence. It believes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you. Therefore, if you are faced by the horrid (yes, horrid, in spite of its intelleigence, or lack of) Beast you should wrap your towel around your head (you do have one, don’t you!?) to TEMPORARILY ward off the Beast’s voracious apetite and furious… fury… sorry.

It seems we have our own local Earthly variant now, reacting to the Abu Ghraib scandal with the belief that if we didn’t see it, it wasn’t there — and banning digital cameras in Iraq.

Mobile phones fitted with digital cameras have been banned in US army installations in Iraq on orders from Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, Britain’s The Business newspaper reported yeterday.

Quoting a Pentagon source, the paper said the US Defence Department believes that some of the damning photos of US soldiers abusing Iraqis at Abu Ghraib prison near Baghdad were taken with camera phones.

“Digital cameras, camcorders and cellphones with cameras have been prohibited in military compounds in Iraq,” it said, adding that a “total ban throughout the US military” is in the works.

(via Boing Boing)

iTunes: “Drink With Me” by Crivello, Anthony/Students/Women from the album Les Misérables (1986, 2:39).

The library is really cool

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I did manage to spend a little time looking around the Seattle Library this Sunday with Prairie and Hope for their opening day festivities. I think this was the first, and quite likely only, time I’ve ever seen a line to get into a library!

The Seattle Central Library

Unfortunately, the downside to hitting it on opening day was that there were just so many people there that it soon became overwhelming, and we soon decided that it would be easier to explore on a later date when it wasn’t as crowded. We made it through the first few levels of the building and really enjoyed what we saw, but it was all just a bit too much to take the full tour. I’ll be heading back as soon as I have some time.

One last picture from the day before I go — me, reflected in one of the building’s overhangs.

Me at the Seattle Library

iTunes: “Love U More (Band of Gypsies)” by Sunscreem from the album Love U More (1992, 6:13).

Draft targeted to resume in spring 2005

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There have been rumors about this for a while now, but it’s been looking more and more likely all the time, and now the first major steps have been set in motion.

There is pending legislation in the House and Senate (twin bills: S 89 and HR 163) which will time the program’s initiation so the draft can begin at early as Spring 2005 — just after the 2004 presidential election. The administration is quietly trying to get these bills passed now, while the public’s attention is on the elections, so our action on this is needed immediately.

\$28 million has been added to the 2004 Selective Service System (SSS) budget to prepare for a military draft that could start as early as June 15, 2005. Selective Service must report to Bush on March 31, 2005 that the system, which has lain dormant for decades, is ready for activation.

(via Phil)

iTunes: “I’m Too Sexy (Spanish)” by Right Said Fred from the album I’m Too Sexy (1991, 2:51).

Shrek 2

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We also saw Shrek 2, which was a far more enjoyable experience than Troy.

Not quite as strong as the first overall, but still very enjoyable, and quite funny. Eddie Murphy was actually funny (which only ever seems to happen in animated films anymore), and Antonio Banderas absolutely stole the show as Puss in Boots. The animation continues to get better and better, of course (some of the facial expressions are stunning to watch, especially Fiona’s as she faces the trial of introducing Shrek to her parents).

The real fun, though, was everything in the background. There is so much going on behind the actual action that it will easily take multiple viewings to catch it all, from references to other movies (Raiders of the Lost Ark, Mission Impossible, and Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, among others) to the stores in Far Far Away (Abercrombie and Witch, Tower of London Records, Old Knavery, and — of course — multiple Farbucks coffee stores [one of my favorite gags, in fact, was panicked people running out of a Farbucks under attack from a giant Gingerbread Man — directly into another Farbucks just across the street]).

The humor felt to me like it was pushed a little further to the adult side of the spectrum than the first Shrek was, too. Not so far that parents should question taking their children to the film (though do keep in mind that it is rated PG, not G), but definitely a lot for the adults to laugh at.

This one’s definitely worth checking out.

iTunes: “A Question of Time (New Town/Live)” by Depeche Mode from the album A Question of Time (1986, 11:08).

Troy

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Prairie and I saw Troy this weekend.

That wasn’t supposed to be a comedy, was it?

So, so disappointing.

For the longest time, I didn’t think much of Brad Pitt. His acting didn’t impress me much in many of his earlier films, and he always struck me as little more than a pretty boy with long blonde hair for the ladies to drool over. Then came Fight Club, and suddenly it became clear that the man could act, and could do a damn good job of it, too. Unfortunately, with Troy, he seems to have gone back to the “pretty boy” routine. Strike a pose onscreen, look good, pout a lot, and try to let that carry the movie instead of actually acting.

I was, however, amused by the constant camera angles that highlighted a nearly naked Brad Pitt putting the very bottom of the shot just barely above where it would otherwise have been indecent. I’m not entirely sure what amused me more: that this shot was a recurring theme, or hearing Prairie beside me muttering, “Just a little bit lower….”

Also, during the big fight sequences, Achillies had one particular move that was featured in every major fight: a leap into the air, twist to the left, and stab downwards with his sword. My thought each time was that that’s got to be his hidden “power move” — left-right-left-down-A-A-B-A, and WHAM, Achilles wins again!

I think I’ve figured out why Helen was considered such a prize. Apparently — at least according to this film — she was the only blonde woman in Greece.

Other than that…bad dialogue, bad music, and overall, some pretty bad acting. A few pretty pictures, and only one halfway interesting fight (Achilles vs. Hector), but that was about the most it had going for it.

Honestly, I can’t even recommend it as a rental.

iTunes: “Ave., The” by Run-D.M.C. from the album Together Forever: Greatest Hits 1983-1991 (1990, 4:07).

Six of one, half dozen of another

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Consequences of participating in the brutal abuse and torture of Iraqi prisoners in the Abu Ghraib prison: one year in prison, a reduction in rank, and a bad conduct discharge.

Consequences of failing to return from military leave after being disturbed by witnessing the brutal abuse and torture of Iraqi prisoners: one year in prison, a 2/3 pay reduction, and a bad conduct discharge.

At least the military is consistent.

Attention Royce: New Thomas Covenant novels

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Stephen Donaldson’s website has a blurb up you might be interested in.

Coming Fall 2004!

The Runes of the Earth

the first of four books in …

The Last Chronicles of

Thomas Covenant

There’s also a .pdf of “chapter one of the prologue” up for download.

I still need to read the first Thomas Covenant novels. Yes, the ones you’ve been telling me to read since we met in 4th grade (or whenever you read them, I suppose). I’ll get around to it one of these days, I swear…

iTunes: “Desire” by Yello from the album Essential (1985, 3:43).

Seattle Central Library: Everybody’s talking about it

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Today on my lunch, I noticed that the Seattle PI had a special section on the new Seattle Central Library. I snagged a copy, and spent a very pleasant lunch reading about the new building.

Apparently, the new library has been getting a ton of press as of late. A mention on MetaFilter led me to quite a few different links:

  • The Seattle P-I: Special section on the new library.
  • The Seattle Times: Special section on the new library.
  • Slate: Koolhaas the Librarian – Critic’s won’t keep quiet about the Seattle Public Library. “Rem Koolhaas, the Stones to Frank Gehry’s Beatles, finally surpasses his rival in star-chitecture. The Californian’s MIT Center got mixed reviews recently, but the Dutchman’s new library earns florid, Bilbao-like superlatives, confirming that architecture criticism is still in its Baroque period.”
  • The New Yorker: High-Tech Bibliophilia. “The [building] is the most important new library to be built in a generation, and the most exhilarating.”
  • The New York Times: The Library That Puts on Fishnets and Hits the Disco. “In more than 30 years of writing about architecture, this is the most exciting new building it has been my honor to review. I could go on piling up superlatives like cars in a multiple collision, but take my word: there’s going to be a whole lot of rubbernecking going on.”
  • Pacific Northwest: Meet your New Central Library. “Somehow this glass box conveys not coldness but intimacy. The result is not just a library, but a community hub and global showplace that transcends its own city block between Madison and Spring streets. It reaches out and melds with the downtown towers around it.”

I am so there for the grand opening on Sunday.

iTunes: “Cabaret (from Cabaret)” by Haworth, Jill from the album Broadway: The Great Original Cast Recordings (1966, 4:31).

Troy in 15 Minutes

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Too, too funny: Troy in Fifteen Minutes.

Some Battlefield

AGAMEMNON: Look, there’s no reason for me to slaughter thousands of your men. You pick out your best soldier, and I pick out mine.

KING OF THESSALY: Deal. [turns to his army] SOME GUYYYYY!

THESSALIAN ARMY: SOME! GUY! SOME! GUY! SOME! GUY!

Some Guy breaks through the crowd. His neck resembles an Easter ham and his spear is the size of a telephone pole.

SOME GUY: RAAAAAAAAA!

AGAMEMNON [turning to his army]: ACHILLEEEEEES!

GREEK ARMY: . . .

AGAMEMNON: . . .

Hut of Wanton Nudity, Some Village

BOY: OMG Achilles you’re late you gotta get up Achilles OMG!

ACHILLES: Dude, I just nailed twins. Call me in the morning.

(via Boing Boing)

iTunes: “Dreamers” by Music Makers, The from the album Junior Vasquez, Vol. 2 (1998, 8:29).