Humor

Things that make me laugh, or that I think will make others laugh.

Better Living Through Apathy

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As cynical as it may be, I think there just might be something to Davan’s theory in today’s Something Positive strip.

Peejee: You don’t really care about this date, do you?

Davan: Not even an ounce. If I did, I probably wouldn’t be going on it.

Peejee: Care to explain?

Davan: When you’re involved with someone else, people find you attractive. It’s because you don’t care about attracting someone else. You’re complacent, and therefore you’re actually being yourself.

After Branwen, I’ve just not been interested in trying to find anyone else. As long as I maintain that same level of ‘it honestly doesn’t matter to me if you live or die,’ women will find me attractive on some level. The minute I show any interest, it’s over. Remember that. The key to happiness is disinterest mingled with mild contempt.

iTunes “You Are My Sunshine” by Cash, Johnny/Dylan, Bob from the album CBS Nashville Studio Session (1969, 3:27).

Pop!

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Argh!

There’s a sound effect in the song I’m listening to right now — “Useless (The Kruder + Dorfmeister Session)” by Depeche Mode, off of Remixes 81-04 (Limited Edition) — that sounds nearly exactly like the “pop” noise iChat makes when I get a new message from someone I’m not currently in a conversation with and a new window pops on screen.

I looked around my screen three times in a row before I figured out where the “pop” noises were coming from.

I’m a dork.

iTunes “Useless (The Kruder + Dorfmeister Session)” by Depeche Mode from the album Remixes 81-04 (Limited Edition) (2004, 9:07).

Acapella Nintendo

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It’s not often I find something that appeals equally to two such disparate sides of my childhood — the video game playing geek and the award-winning children’s choir member — but this video of University of Wisconsin acapella group Redefined singing Nintendo theme songs manages to pull it off…and quite well, at that.

Geeky, yes — but very cool!

iTunes “Firefly, The” by Chag, Niraj from the album Untouchable Outcaste Beats Vol. 1 (1997, 5:37).

Friday cat Tribble blogging!

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“Friday Cat Blogging” is a well-known, oft-derided, but much loved cliché in the weblogging community. However, for those of us that don’t have cats, while we might enjoy looking at everyone else’s, we sometimes end up feeling a bit left out.

However.

I may not have a cat…

…but I do have a Tribble!

And so begins “Friday Tribble Blogging!”

Friday Tribble Blogging, my apartment, Seattle, WA

Isn’t he cute? :) He’s nestled up on my bed right now, napping on my pillows. They look so innocent when they’re asleep….

It’s all in the name…

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From an IRC conversation in #flickr this morning: how I first caught Prairie’s eye, and some very abnormal psychology.

djwudi: :nods
cygnoir: AHA! MUD person!
cygnoir points points.
djwudi: not quite…
djwudi: much as it shames me to say this — too many years in Yahoo! Crack
djwudi: when my work ‘puter wouldn’t let me install an IRC client
cygnoir: aaaah.
cygnoir: i used to hang out in the trivia rooms.
djwudi: I was in the Alaska rooms for years
cygnoir: as ‘HoneyIsBeeBarf’ and also ‘cygnoir’ and ‘halsted’ too.
djwudi: I had quite a few names
djwudi: started with djwudi
djwudi: most of the others…well, things just went downhill
djwudi: though I met my g/f because I was using the name ‘pyropedonecrobestiality’
cygnoir hehs.
cygnoir: whoa.
djwudi: she figured anyone with a name like that had to have some actual intelligence behind it
cygnoir: safe bet.
djwudi: it’s the short version of something a friend of mine came up with
cygnoir: so you have sex with dead, aflame, underaged animals.
djwudi: he and his g/f at the time were in an abnormal psych class
cygnoir: er not you.
djwudi: and one boring day, they strung together every term they could think of, then had to figure out what it meant
cygnoir: but the theoretical you.
djwudi: I don’t remember the entire actual word, but it ended up being the fear of being forced to pretend to have sex with an underaged, flaming, dead animal in a small, crowded wading pool at 14,000 feet.
cygnoir laughs.
cygnoir: then claustro and agora and hydro have to be in there.
cygnoir: and acro
djwudi: found it
djwudi: Pseudocoitoxenohematomysonecropyrobestio-acroclaustro-ochlohydrophobia
djwudi: The fear of being forced to pretend to have sex with the unfamiliar bloody infected corpse of a flaming animal at 15,000 feet in a small crowded wading pool.
bringo: oi veh
julian_the: …
djwudi laughs
djwudi: and there’s a conversation killer!
wirehead_: My my.
djwudi: and that’s responsible for getting me my girlfriend
djwudi: i’m not quite sure what that says about us

Whatever it says about us, I’m glad it caught her eye. :)

iTunes “Doctorin’ the Tardis (12″)” by Timelords, The from the album Doctorin’ the Tardis (1991, 8:16).

Best. April. Fools. Story. EVAR!!!1!!11!

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Courtesy of StarTrek.com:

With Star Trek: Enterprise hanging by a veritable thread the last two years, a new direction for the show has recently been unveiled that is being hailed both as a triumph of corporate synergy for the Viacom-owned Paramount Pictures, and a way to keep the show on the air.

[…]

Enter the darlings of Viacom-owned Comedy Central, Star Trek fans Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of South Park. Parker and Stone, you may recall, also made Paramount’s “Team America: World Police,” which ran in theaters last year and comes out on DVD in May. The movie grossed only $50 million worldwide, but it turned a profit for the studio due to its low production budget.

“The pieces fall together brilliantly,” said a top Viacom spokesperson. “Matt and Trey take over Enterprise, and it’s all done with marionettes! It’s like Thunderbirds and Captain Scarlet all over. Gerry Anderson, watch out.”

[…]

Parker and Stone have already started making a shooting model of the Enterprise NX-01, thus reviving an old Star Trek tradition. “We prefer the look of physical, tangible models over CGI ships any day,” Parker said. “Of course, we have no visual effects budget whatsoever, so we won’t be painting out the strings. You’ll get used to it. Still trying to figure out where to put the propeller.”

“We’re also gonna re-do the opening title sequence,” Stone revealed. “Record a new theme — something bombastic, action-oriented. Y’know, something that isn’t, like, totally gay.”

Funeral Music

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Prairie just pointed out this list of the top ten favorite funeral songs in Europe:

  1. Queen’s “The Show Must Go On”
  2. Led Zeppelin’s “Stairway to Heaven”
  3. AC/DC’s “Highway to Hell”
  4. Frank Sinatra’s “My Way”
  5. Mozart’s “Requiem”
  6. Robbie Williams’ “Angels”
  7. Queen’s “Who Wants to Live Forever”
  8. The Beatles’s “Let It Be”
  9. Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters”
  10. U2’s “With or Without You”

I’m finding the mental image of a full congregation of mourners standing in a cathedral, colored shafts of light cast through the stained glass windows slowly moving across their faces, sadly and somberly intoning AC/DC’s ‘Highway to Hell’ to the accompaniment of a church organist and choir far too amusing for my own good.

iTunes “Firemission” by Noxious Emotion from the album This Hallowed Ground (1995, 5:27).