LotR:TYEBEE (Lord of the Rings: Till Your Eyes Bleed Extended Edition)

With the release of a six-minute long trailer for the upcoming Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King Extended Edition, excitment about finally being able to see the full-length, uncut version of the trilogy is mounting. Prairie and I have had rough plans to hold a LOTRfest once the DVD was out — now that’ll be a little easier, thanks to a /.er who planned out a schedule:

11hr and 20 min is a significant investment of time, but I think it can be done.

7am: friends arrive, pancake breakfast.
8am: Fellowship of the Ring (\~4+ hrs)
12:30pm: Lunch
2:00pm: The Two Towers (\~3 1/2 hrs)
5:30pm: Dinner
7:00pm: Return of the King (\~ 4 1/2 hrs)
11:30pm: Eyes ooze out of our sockets, bedsores open on our asses.

Sounds like a pretty good approach to me. Prairie and I haven’t solidified a specific day for this yet, but would any Seattle-area friends feel like submitting themselves to this along with us some upcoming weekend?

Let me know!

Update: Prairie took a moment to actually look at a calendar (all these new-fangled concepts that I just don’t ever seem to grasp), and it looks like the target date is Saturday, Dec. 18th. Consider this an open invite (at least until I start worrying about how many people I can fit into a studio apartment, if I actually get that much interest). :)

(via Arcterex)

LotR:TRotKEE

The Official Lord of the Rings website has posted a trailer for the upcoming Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King Extended Edition DVD, to be released on Dec. 14^th^!

Over fifty new minutes of footage, including the Mouth of Sauron, the taking of the Black Ships, Saruman’s demise, Gandalf confronting the Witch King…and, as they say, much, much more.

I’m so jazzed about this.

The weekend it comes out, Prairie and I are planning on taking a full day to kick back and watch the entire Extended Edition trilogy from beginning to end. Somewhere around 12 or 13 hours all told, I think.

And, if you haven’t bothered to pick up the Extended Edition versions of the first two films in the trilogy, instead waiting for the inevitable box set release — wait no longer! All three Extended Edition releases in a single box set, and it’s only \$80 from Amazon. Not bad at all, really.

If I didn’t already have the first two, I’d snap it up. As it is, though, I’ll be quite happy just to get the third and see all the new goodies. The hard part will be waiting to watch it until Prairie’s here on the weekend!

iTunesWhere the Streets Have No Name (I Can’t Take My Eyes Off You) (12” Dance)” by Pet Shop Boys from the album Where the Streets Have No Name (I Can’t Take My Eyes Off You) (1991, 7:36).

Lord of the Rings dating tips

Epic fantasy as a dating manual?

  • When you’re trying to catch the cute guy’s eye is the exact moment the dwarf will pick to approach you;
  • Eating raw fish is no longer a sign of a sophisticated date. (That said, you have to admit the Atkins plan is working for Gollum.)
  • If you’re the only girl among 100 guys you’ll still fall for the only one who has a girlfriend;
  • When overused, terms of endearment such as “precious” lose their meaning;
  • All couples fight, but battles shouldn’t last so long that one of you has to get up and stretch your legs or use the bathroom;
  • It doesn’t matter if you look like Liv Tyler; your pining and whining will still get on people’s nerves;
  • Don’t blame your friends just because they can see right through your creepy little partner;
  • If you can get along on a road trip, the relationship will probably last;
  • There will come a point when it seems like the relationship should be over. Don’t drag it out. Just end it there.

And finally, the mother of all dating wisdom:

  • Some people will go to any lengths to get a ring; others, having had one for awhile, will go to any lengths to chuck it into a volcano.

(via Rachel)

iTunes: “Moron” by K.M.F.D.M. from the album WWIII (2003, 5:05).

LotR:TRotK EE DVD – 4h50m+?

I think I just wanted to make the most cryptic post title possible. ;)

Apparently, Peter Jackson recently revealed that the DVD Extended Edition of Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King “will be longer than 4 hours and 50 min” long!

Wow.

Let’s see. About 3:28 for the extended TFotR, about 3:43 for the extended TTT, and possibly over 4:50 for the extended TRotK. We’re rapidly approaching a solid twelve hours for the full saga when all is said and done.

Sweet. I’m all for it. Bring it on!

(via Jarret House North)

Return of the King nitpicks

Whenever I see a film, it usually takes me two viewings — or, if two viewings isn’t warranted, a few days after seeing the film — for me to really lock down my impressions of the film. The first time I go in, I essentially empty my mind, and accept the reality of the film as it’s presented to me, and it’s generally not until some time after the film, or after the second viewing, that I really start to analyze it on a more critical level. While this doesn’t give me much hope for a career as a professional reviewer, as I don’t like being overly critical on my initial viewing, I’ve found it generally tends to work well for me for solidifying — or altering — my opinions of movies in the long run.

After watching Return of the King for the second time today, I’m still quite solidly convinced that Peter Jackson’s Lord of the Rings trilogy is, quite simply, one of the greatest achievements in filmmaking in recent years. However, that doesn’t stop me from finding the occasional odd thing to mention…such as two goofs, and a few choices that I’m not entirely happy with.

First off, the goofs — and why not start with the worst of the two that I noticed?

One of the most beautiful shots in the trailer for The Two Towers was a sweeping helicopter shot of Eddoras that started close in on Eowyn as she stood before the Great Hall, then pulled back and around, giving an incredible panorama of Eddoras and the surrounding countryside. That shot never made it into the final cut of The Two Towers (either the theatrical or the extended version), but about half of it has been used in Return of the King as the opening shot of Eddoras as the Rohirrim return home from Helm’s Deep. Unfortunately, in a surprisingly bad choice, rather than moving from Eowyn out, we start with a wide shot of Eddoras and track in…which required running the already filmed shot backwards, something which is made all too obvious by the smoke being apparently sucked into the chimneys of the houses! Someone wasn’t paying quite as much attention as the should have been when that shot was approved.

Now on to goof number two. Just after Eowyn dispatches the Witch King and his fell beast, she turns to comfort the fallen Theoden, and we see them from directly above. We see Eowyn crouched over her father, who lies on his back on the ground, the corpse of his horse across the lower part of his torso. We can see his upper torso from approximately waist level and up, but we can also see his boots projecting from underneath the horse. As far as I can tell, either his boots were knocked off during the fall (and just happened to fall where they did, both with the toes pointed upwards), or Theoden was actually somewhere around eight or nine feet tall! It’s a fairly short shot, but once I saw his feet sticking out from underneath the horse’s belly, it was a little hard to suppress a slight laugh.

As far as editing choices I wish had been different, there are four that really stick out to me.

First off, along with many other people, I really wish that we’d been given some closure with Saruman. Considering how much of a presence he was in the first two films, having him so conspicuously absent this time is definitely somewhat jarring, and for some reason it seemed to be more so this time around. Not only would it have given us more satisfaction than an almost casual “well, we just don’t have to worry about him anymore,” it would have helped to explain Pippin’s discovery of the Palantir lying in the waters outside Isengard — which as it is, without seeing Wormtongue’s foolish tantrum where he tries to bean Gandalf with whatever he can find at hand to throw, seems far too convenient of a coincidence. Of course, I’d also like to see Wormtongue get his comeuppance after Saruman realizes what he’s just managed to do, too…

I kind of wish that either the sequence where the Witch King tells one of his Orc henchman that he will deal with Gandalf had been left out, or the confrontation between the two on the ramparts of Minas Tirith had been left in. Instead, now we have a setup with no payoff. It’s easy enough to rationalize it away — that the battle was hectic enough that the Witch King ended up confronting Eowyn before he got around to Gandalf — but it still ends up feeling a little kludgy.

Also, some resolution with the Orc commander would have been good. He’s a definite presence all throughout the taking of Osgiliath and the first part of the siege of Minas Tirith, but then he just disappears in the chaos — again, setup without payoff.

In a series where the main bad guy is never actually realized as a physical presence beyond the prologue sequence in The Fellowship of the Ring, it seems to me that it’s important for us to get as much resolution as possible with the bad guys that we do get to see. In TFotR we had Lurtz (the leader of Saruman’s band of Uruk-Hai), and in TTT we had Saruman (while we didn’t see the final resolution to his storyline, we did get the satisfaction of watching the Ents lay waste to Isengard while Saruman watched and fumed from the balcony). In RotK, of the three possible cathartic victories — Saruman, the Orc Commander, and the Witch King — we only got to see one of them. Admittedly, the one we did get to see was wonderful (even with a more reserved audience than that of opening weekend at the Cinerama, her “I am no man!” line still got cheers and applause from the audience), but it would have been more satisfying if Saruman and the Orc commander had been dealt with on screen as well.

And lastly, as much as I enjoy the opening sequence giving us Gollum’s backstory, I can’t help but think that Andy Serkis adopted the Gollum personality far too quickly. I’d always understood Gollum’s persistent use of “us” when referring to himself as an indication of his split personality between Gollum, twisted and corrupted by the Ring, and Smeagol, the essentially good Hobbit-like creature unfortunately ensnared by the will of Sauron. That impression is only strengthened in sequences where, when Smeagol confronts Gollum, the Smeagol personality refers to himself as “I” or “me”, where the Gollum personality continues to refer to itself as “us”. It’s as if Gollum, as the Ring and the will of Sauron, knows that no matter how strong his hold over his victim is, there is still some slight danger that Smeagol will reassert himself, and so Gollum must continually keep watch and keep Smeagol under control.

However, in RotK’s prologue sequence, Serkis lapses into his “Gollum voice” as soon as he sees the Ring being held by Deagol, instantly demanding that Deagol “gives it to us.” I don’t remember offhand just how this was handled in the book, but I’d always had it in my head that the division between Smeagol and Gollum and the self-referential “us” would have appeared over time as Smeagol battled for what sense of himself he could retain under the influence of the Ring. And, even if the plural form of self address was an affectation of Smeagol’s before coming into possession of the Ring, I would have preferred it if the “Gollum voice” didn’t kick in until later on in his deterioration.

The really funny thing for me is that with the things I’ve outlined above — especially the last four points, as goofs can creep into any movie, no matter how well planned — I find RotK as a single movie the least deserving of a Best Picture Oscar than either FotR or TTT. Taking all three as single entities in and of themselves, I’d probably put FotR at the top of the heap, with RotK just after it and TTT at the end. Now, taking all three as a single entity, especially when factoring in the Extended Edition versions of the first two (and projecting the extended version of RotK, as some of the issues I brought up are supposed to be addressed in its extended DVD release next November), I think that not only does the entire Lord of the Rings series deserve just about every Oscar in the book, but that Peter Jackson should be given some sort of special achievement award for being able to so successfully translate Tolkein’s work to film (is it too early in his career for a lifetime achievement award?). I just find RotK’s theatrical version to be the clumsiest of the three theatrical releases.

In any case, it was still a lot of fun to see the movie again in the theater, and I definitely look forward to adding it to my collection to view many more times over the coming years. All of the nitpicks I have with the film are really fairly minor in the long run, and as mentioned, the Extended Edition should take care of a good number of them upon its release. Too bad that’s not until next November!

MiddleEarth mania, week three: The Return of the King

Well, it’s done. Prairie and I just got back from seeing The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King at the Cinerama.

I read something earlier this week on the ‘net. Unfortunately, I can’t remember where, so I can’t give attribution — but it’s a statement that I can now say quite safely that I wholeheartedly agree with. Until this year, had someone mentioned The Trilogy in conversation so that you could hear the capital ‘t’s, it would have been fairly understood that they most likely were talking about Star Wars.

Not anymore. LotR:TRotK caps off the new reigning champion of popular cinematic trilogys in grand style.

Prairie and I had tickets to the 7:45pm showing, but we knew that this being opening weekend we’d want to get there fairly early to ensure good seats. So, after an early bed last night and a good night’s sleep, we packed up our supplies (books for each of us, an umbrella, and two collapsible chairs from the trunk of her car), we headed down to the Cinerama at 4pm. We weren’t sure at first whether that might have been a bit too early, but as it turns out, our instincts were right on the money, as we ended up about 15 people back from the front of the line (in fact, we realized that we’d ended up waiting at almost exactly the same spot for all three weeks of our LotR experience), and it wasn’t more than about five minutes before more people showed up and took the spots right behind us.

Luckily enough, it turned out to be a nicely mild evening, without the wind and drizzling rain of last weekend. We’d each bundled up for the wait, and ended up spending a very pleasant three hours kicked back in our spot, chatting, reading, and watching the line grow behind us as more and more people appeared. About ten minutes before the doors opened I took a few minutes to stretch my legs and went off to find the end of the line…which had wrapped down from the Cinerama to the corner, around the corner, and then halfway again down the length of the block. We were quite happy we decided to come out as early as we did!

About the only downside was that when we arrived, there was one guy just ahead of us in line — but by the time the doors were about to open, he’d been joined by five of his friends (and this had also happened with a few other people ahead of us in line, and just behind us as well). I can certainly understand holding a spot in line for one friend, but it’s nothing but annoying when someone holds a spot at the beginning of the line for groups of people, who can then show up not more than ten minutes before the doors open and slide into line in front of people who’d been waiting there for hours. Very rude, and quite aggravating — luckily for them, I didn’t think my umbrella would stand up to smacking all six of them around, so I kept my peace.

Still, once the doors opened and the line surged forward, we made our way in and managed to snag good seats yet again — dead center, six rows back on the lower level (just one row closer to the screen than last week, and two rows closer than we were for Fellowship — thank goodness it’s only a trilogy!). After that, it was just a matter of waiting for everyone to fill in and find their seats, until eventually, the lights went down, and applause and cheers filled the room.

We were treated to three trailers before the show started. The first was for Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, which got applause and cheers from the audience. Next up was a trailer for The Mask is Back, which had the audience in dumbfounded silence until the end, when the auditorium was filled with a resounding chorus of boos and catcalls (which did something to restore some of my faith in the intelligence of the moviegoing public — or at least that section of the moviegoing public crazy enough to stand in line for LotR:TRotK on its first weekend). Last up was a trailer for The Butterfly Effect, which didn’t get much of a reaction at all (the trailers don’t impress me much, but I am interested in the premise of the film, so we’ll see how that goes once it opens).

Finally, the lights went down all the way, and the movie began… Rather than jumping straight into the action as was done with LotR:TTT, LotR:TRotK starts off with a look back long before the events of the trilogy, fleshing out Gollum’s background and showing the discovery of the Ring and the tragic events surrounding Smeagol’s acquisition of his “birthday present” from his brother Deagol. A marvelously creepy sequence shows us Smeagol’s deterioration into Gollum under the influence of the Ring, until we finally cut forward to hear Gollum muttering to himself as Sam and Frodo rest on their journey into Mordor.

(Note: much of the following text is “spoiler” information, which I’ve hidden for the time being — just swipe the blank areas of the text with your cursor if you’ve already seen the film….)

This is by far the most intense of the three films, moving back and forth among multiple storylines, hardships, moments of despair, and sudden triumphs. As jaw-dropping as the assault on Helms Deep was in LotR:TTT, the assault on Minis Tirith puts it to shame. There were so many wonderful (and wonderfully horrible) moments in the battles, from the Orc commander’s call to “release the prisoners” (at which point the severed heads of fallen Gondorian soldiers were lobbed into Minas Tirith), to the appearance of the giant war-Olifaunts, to Eowyn’s stand against the Nazgul king — “I am no man!” — (which got one of the loudest cheers from the audience) that I’m going to have to see it at least once more in the theaters just to start to take it all in. One amusing side-note about the Orc commander, though — I’d always wondered just what happened to Sloth after Goonies ended…and now I know!

Shelob was everything I’d been hoping she’d be, marvelously frightening and menacing. Her sudden appearance from the hole in the cave wall just when you think that Frodo made it through her lair safely got a wonderful gasp, and the scene where she hovers over Frodo was perfectly done! Everyone in the audience was on the edge of their seat, with nervous laughter filling the room from the tension of the moment…and when she finally strikes, everyone gasped and laughed with the sudden release of that tension — until the sudden realization hit that Frodo had been stung, when the entire auditorium fell dead silent.

I loved, loved, loved the look of the army of the dead that Aragorn confronts.

The interaction among Gollum, Frodo and Sam, as Gollum uses the effects of the ring to aid him in his own treachery was handled perfectly, so much so that it almost hurt to watch as his efforts took hold.

All in all, a truly masterful achievement. But, as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end, and — save looking forward to the release of the Extended Edition on DVD next November — the journey is finally finished. The credits rolled, the lights came up, and we left the theater, at first with little more than “Oh, wow,” on our lips. Next out from Prairie was, “I want to go back to stand in line and see it again!” I can’t really argue with that!

Congratulations, Peter Jackson (and everyone else involved) — you’ve filmed what was commonly held to be an unfilmable work. Now, would someone please release the rights so that he can do The Hobbit?!? I want to see Smaug on screen!

MiddleEarth mania, week two: The Two Towers

And speaking of LotR, I just realized that I’d completely forgotten to say anything about seeing LotR:TTTEE at the Cinerama on Saturday.

As we’d done the week before, Prairie and I started by wandering downtown for some food (stopping by the Red Robin at the waterfront this week), then working our way up to the Cinerama in time to stand in line for the show. The weather wasn’t nearly as nice this week as it had been the week prior, instead treating us to wind and rain — typical Seattle winter, really, so we didn’t complain much. We did, however, stop off at Bed Bath and Beyond to pick me up a decent umbrella, and took a quick swing through Starbucks to get two large Caramel Apple Ciders.

Yes, yes, I know — friends don’t let friends drink Starbucks. But not being a coffee drinker, I didn’t get the coffee, and their Caramel Apple Ciders are truly wondrous things. So there. ;)

So, cider in hand, we wandered over to the Cinerama to start waiting for the show. When we got there, there were only two people in the line, so we elected to wait under the overhang of the building until the line started to grow. Once the line hit about ten people, we figured that was as long as we wanted it to get before jumping in — up went the umbrella, and we staked out our spot.

The next hour or so was spent attempting to stay warm and dry, and chatting with the people around us in line. The group behind us had planned a needed dental trip to Seattle to coincide with the show, and just behind them were a small group of three girls who had brought a tarp to stand underneath. Fortuitously enough, the Cinerama apparently keeps a small stash of umbrellas around for such occasions, and an employee soon came out to distribute umbrellas along the line for those who didn’t have them, provoking great glee from the group of girls when one of them got a frilly purple umbrella to use.

Eventually, we all made it in. This week was a little more exciting for Prairie and I — last week, we’d each already seen the Extended Edition of The Fellowship of the Ring on DVD, so the novelty was primarily in seeing it on the big screen. This week, while I’d already broken down and watched the Extended Edition of The Two Towers on DVD (I couldn’t wait!), Prairie had not, so much of the movie was entirely new to her (and she loved it).

Apparently, she wasn’t the only audience member who’d held out on seeing the “new bits” until they could see it in the theater. The audience for the show was great — gasping, laughing, and often applauding throughout the film. Legolas got two rounds of applause (for his vault onto the horse during the warg attack and the love-it-or-hate-it shield ride down the stairs [for the record, I think it’s goofy and a bit unnecessary, but not something I’m going to raise a huge fuss about, either]), Gandalf’s appearance at the top of the hill at the end of the battle at Helm’s Deep prompted another surge of applause, and there were a few more here and there.

The new/extended scenes got their fair share of appreciative laughs, too — especially Merry and Pippin drinking the Ent Draught in Fangorn Forest, and later discovering the larder (complete with two barrels of pipeweed) after the siege of Orthanc.

And that was that — two down, one to go. This upcoming Saturday at 7:45pm, we’ll be settling comfortably into our seats to watch the end of the trilogy. Finally!

It's almost time…

Metacritic currently has LotR:TRotK at 95/100.

Rotten Tomatoes has it at 98/100.

The movie opens tomorrow.

And I don’t see it until Saturday night.

Yes.

I’m whining.

Update: Phil‘s not helping…;)

Hey, you could totally include me on your “It’s about time” entry.

On a scale of 1 to 100, I give it approximately a “fucking awesome.” (That marks the third time I’ve said that tonight.)

(via iChat)

Update: Neither is Kirsten

I just got back from seeing the Return of the King.

I have not the words for what I just experienced. Saying it was the best film I have ever seen would be an understatement.

But I’ll say it anyway.

That was the best fucking film I have EVER fucking seen!

…I can’t believe [Michael’s] waiting until Saturday.

This is going to be a long few days!

LotR Research Project

A team of researchers at Lord of the Rings Research is going to be looking for our impressions of Peter Jackson’s films, with the questionnaire going live the day that Return of the King opens. Could be interesting…

A unique opportunity for you to record your thoughts on the final part of The Lord of the Rings. From the day the film is released, you will have the opportunity to take part in the biggest ever international research project, to find out what audiences in all countries thought of The Return of the King. What did you enjoy about it? Did anything disappoint or annoy you? Was it important to you?

(via hegemony rules)